Yes! In therapy, distant, fighting couples can fix an unhealthy, toxic relationship. Also, a good couples therapist knows that human relationships are challenging, intense, intense, and difficult. The holistic couples therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling also know that couples do things they regret. Plus, people often engage in toxic or dysfunctional behaviors when they are coping with negative feelings in unhealthy ways. Toxic energy is a symptom of a larger issue. Let’s talk about how we help you shift negative communication to the positive, loving kind. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy supports meaningful connection and playfulness.
So, in LGBTQIA+ affirming couples therapy, you can gain awareness for underlying problems, unresolved trauma, cheating, and unhealthy family relationships.
As well, drug use, alcoholism, or addiction contribute to a toxic relationship. Working with a therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you understand what might be at the heart and what may be the source of the toxic interaction. Negative communication can lead to feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, and never feeling good enough. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy can support you in understanding your unhealthy relationship behaviors. Shutting down, the silent treatment, and anger are unhealthy. These are also signs of unhappiness.
“My husband and I got married about a year ago. When it is good, it is good, and when it is bad, it is bad. We have been having the same arguments over and over.”
Couples therapists understand trauma bonds
When couples get stuck in the same argument over and over, there is often a trauma cycle. Perhaps, one of you had a parent in childhood who was an alcoholic. Or, you had a parent that never expressed love or affection. In childhood, we don’t truly understand what is happening to us until adult years. Unfortunately, we often mirror and mimic childhood patterns that we saw our parents do to us. If you or your spouse had parents who were toxic or immature, you might find that your disagreements get out of hand. If your parents yelled or got into domestic violent fights, you may have major problems in your communication now in your relationship.
With the help of a couples therapist, you can change your toxic relationship into a more positive one.
As well, when you and your partner are equally committed to building trust and doing the work, overcoming a toxic relationship is actually easier than you might imagine.
When both people deeply want a better relationship, they can gain self-awareness and self reflection tools through counseling. Shared meaning is a huge benefit from LGBTQIA+ couples therapy. A lot of times, couples also have different ideas of what different words mean. For instance, good communication may mean texting every day to your spouse. But, good communication might mean sitting down and having a face-to-face conversation to you. Essentially, your LGBTQIA+ affirming couples therapist can help you increase shared meaning. You can learn to have open communication and honest communication.
How does trauma play a role in open communication?
Sometimes, one person in the relationship will develop anxiety or worry if they feel communication is not being honestly given. Trauma memories of hurt and rejection can be re-triggered in arguments.
How do you tell if a person is unhappy in their marriage?
An unhappy person will be in a bad mood, irritable, critical, and deep down feel hurt.
How does unhappiness create conflict in your relationship?
The other person my truly believe they are giving honest communication. A toxic cycle breaks out as one person feels confused and hurt when the other person questions or challenges their choices. Your LGBTQIA+ affirming couple therapist can help you overcome a toxic relationship by gaining a sense of emotional support. Emotionally validating your spouse is a great skill from couples therapy. Essentially, your relationship therapist can help both of you understand and hear each other.
How can you tell if your marriage needs counseling?
There are high conflict fights, irritability, fears of abandonment, yelling, hurt feelings, and it never gets resolved. You feel hopeless after a fight and don’t know what to say to resolve things. On an individual level you can find some healing from your traumatic childhoods, and on a couple level, you can gain compassion together. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy supports holistic self-care outlets. From stress management skills, you can bring your best self to your relationship.
To begin, click the button below for your phone consult for Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy and deep connection.
“We try to make progress and move forward but it always comes back to the same subjects. I don’t want my partner to argue about my gender, my sexuality, or my gender expression.”
As well, LGBTQIA+ couples therapy in Fairfield, Connecticut means that you get a therapist that specializes with same-sex couples. Same-sex couples have a variety of different challenges because there is a lot of internalize shame and rejection. If you are in a same-sex relationship, you may get into high conflict fights, or feel like your partner is giving you the silent treatment.
Furthermore, Fairfield, Connecticut couples therapy supports sharing fondness, love, and admiration.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, your LGBTQIA+ couples counselor has experience and expert training and working with lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender couples. Whether you or your partner identify as non-binary or queer, our team would love to help support you. As well, LGBTQIA+ couples therapy incorporates affirming language for intersex, asexual, pansexual, and by gender individuals. Bi-gender individuals may also identify as two-spirited. No matter your gender expression or gender identity, you may still feel hopeless about your romantic relationship. The fights feel overwhelming.
Sometimes, couples who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community tend to feel feeling more criticized.
Now, this can be because of the trauma you experienced in their own coming out process in childhood. As well, when your spouse criticizes you, you may feel like a child being yelled at by your parents all over again. Couples counseling in Fairfield, Connecticut can support calm communication and reduce yelling. You can both learn alternatives to criticism such as using, “I feel,” statements to share.
To begin, click the button below for your phone consult for Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy and connection.
Is there trauma lingering from your coming out process, which triggers a deep need for acceptance from your spouse?
Coming out may have caused you to feel rejection or alienation from your family. So, now you may more deeply want to feel a sense of closeness with your partner. When you don’t get that closeness, you feel even more rejected and hurt. It might feel like there is no one on your team or no one on your side. As well, toxic marital patterns can happen to LGBTQIA+ couples more because there is cultural shame around asking for help. You might be afraid your therapist will reject you or ridicule you. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy supports a healthy, close relationship after trauma.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, we are LGBTQIA+ affirming and inclusive of all humans.
You might get stuck in the blame game or you might feel like your partner is critical of you all the time. Essentially, couples therapy in Fairfield, Connecticut that is LGBTQIA+ affirming can help you change your toxic relationship. You can learn to step away from manipulation and criticism. Instead of yelling or hurtful jabs, you can use positive communication tools. Also, your LGBTQIA+ affirming couples therapist can help you share when you feel frustrated, scared, disgusted, or sad.
Understanding the root of criticism and the emotions underneath can be very positive and changing a toxic relationship.
How does self-care play a role in bettering your romantic relationship?
As well, your LGBTQIA+ marriage counselor in Fairfield, Connecticut can help you improve your mental well-being on a personal level. A lot of times, in toxic relationships, couples are in a negative mindset. And, they are not practicing regular self-care. You might feel exhausted from responsibilities of running your home, childcare, and working. Also, you might be trying to prove yourself to your partner or always trying to gain some traction.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, our team of LGBTQIA+ affirming therapists provide queer and transgender individuals a safe place to heal and grow together.
No matter what trauma you had in childhood, or the rejection you faced during your coming out process, the therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling support LGBTQIA+ couples.
You can learn to be amazing to each other from couples therapy in Fairfield, Connecticut. In addition, in our offices, we have rainbow flags, LGBTQIA+ affirming books, and magazines. And, we can recommend books that support you and your partner in building the healthy relationship you desire.
To begin, click the button below for your phone consult for Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy and playfulness.
What happens when people have different levels of experience marriage?
As well, one of you may have been in LGBTQIA+ or same sex relationships in the past. But, the other one of you may have a very minimal level of experience. When couples have differences in sexual experiences, that can create insecurity. One of you may have come out as a teenager as lesbian, bisexual, or non-binary. Whereas, the other one of you may be just coming out over the last few months as lesbian, bisexual, or gay in adult years.
For one of you, it may be the first time you have been in and LGBTQIA+ relationship.
There might be a sense of newfound anxiety around being accepted by your family and friends on holidays. All of these different stressors can contribute to a toxic relationship.
What are signs of a toxic communication style?
Additionally, it might feel like you try to make progress or explain yourself when you fight. But, it never really works. One thing to remember is that it is not helpful to explain your point of you. Your LGBTQIA+ couples therapist will actually stop you and pause you if you begin to explain yourself too much in a session. Yes, it is always okay to talk about how you feel, but explaining is another story. On that note, LGBTQIA+ couples frequently get into arguments where they are trying to convince the other person to see their side. Essentially, marriage therapy switches you over to nonviolent communication and emotional intimacy.
Does marriage counseling make conflicts improve?
Yes! When two people want to build a new way, a positive way of connecting, they truly can. It takes commitment and determination to change negative family patterns. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy can teach you positive communication skills. You can use these for the rest of your life to build long-lasting love.
A lot of couples don’t learn about emotional intimacy or nonviolent communication until they get to Fairfield, CT couples therapy.
Often times, couples get stuck trying to convince their partner to see it from their eyes or explain their side away. It’s only leads to more of a toxic communication style. And, it also might be perplexing because your romantic relationship is the only one in your life where you feel challenged like this emotionally. That is really normal.
Your most intimate partner is the person that you may get into the most conflicts with because you so deeply love them.
What is one tip for couples who are fighting right now?
Learning to manage your stress on a personal level and practice self-care can be a great way to bring your best self to the relationship. Notice if you are smiling, relax, and enjoying the conversation. Any time when you notice your muscles get tight, your partner starts to groan, or you feel frozen in the conversation, that is a sign that it is moving in a toxic direction. Instead, practice some self-care, take a break in a peaceful spot and take deep breath. Next, switch over to using kind and positive words. Couples therapy can be a great way for LGBTQIA+ and same sex couples to truly feel a sense of togetherness.
To begin, click the button below for your phone consult for Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy.
How can Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy support me and my partner long term?
Wisdom Within Counseling loves helping distant, fighting couples who feel hopeless, betrayed, or stuck after an affair, lying or infidelity rebuild connection, desire and trust.
If you feel yelled at or criticized, the team of therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling would love to help you and your partner step away from blame. You can learn tools for creating emotional closeness. Without the guidance of a professional LGBQIA+ marriage therapist, having deep conversations when pain and hurt are involved can lead to more pain and hurt. At Wisdom Within Counseling, we teach couples how to share feelings in non-violent, caring ways. Then, couples can stop criticism and putting each other down.
Let’s talk about anger, resentment, hurt, and betrayal together in LGBTQIA+ affirming marriage counseling.
We also focus on holistic lifestyle changes and self-care tools to help both people bring the best version of themselves to the relationship. Also, we help same sex and LGBTQIA+ couples who deeply want to feel a sense of meaningful connection and honesty. Overall, couples therapy in Fairfield, Connecticut helps you create togetherness again. Essentially, you just need help building a toolbox of communication skills.
The team at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you work together to heal after hurt, anger, resentment, betrayals, and heartbreak. Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy is available in person or on video at Wisdom Within.
To begin, click the button below for your phone consult for Fairfield, CT LGBTQIA+ couples therapy.
In couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can gain a sense of understanding. As well, you can learn how angry, toxic communication happens and clarity what you can do to prevent it.
Also, we love working with couples who feel they may have PTSD and trauma histories and symptoms and challenging childhoods that negatively impact their marriage and relationship.
You may have been raised by alcoholic parents, or had to be the responsible one and care for others growing up, and didn’t feel your needs were met emotionally. We don’t learn how to build a healthy romantic relationship in school like we do for math and science, and holistic couples therapy can be a safe place to create the loving, positive marriage you desire. You can learn how to heal from childhood pain, past trauma and major losses together as a couple and truly understand how to build a sense of strength, closeness, and connection together.
Learning to nurture each other after childhood trauma is such a huge part of LGBTQIA+ therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling.
Essentially, you can learn about your partner’s trauma wounds and learn to nurture them. You can begin developing and growing an emotional, intimate, and beautiful connection in your romantic relationship. Wisdom Within Counseling would love to help you communicate your needs and wants calmly and effectively.
We want to help you and your partner build a sense of safety, security, and be able to turn towards each other rather than emotionally withdraw, give the silent treatment, or shut down.
Wisdom Within Counseling helps distant couples rebuild communication, emotional connection, joy, playfulness and create a strong foundation for long-lasting love.
Katie Ziskind and the team at Wisdom Within Counseling are Gottman Level Two trained. Also, Katie Ziskind, marriage and family therapist, incorporates her 500 hours of yoga therapy training. She enjoys working with same sex couples and specializes in LGBTQIA+ therapy. The team at Wisdom Within Counseling are LGBTQIA+, non-binary, queer, and transgender affirming and educated.
