When you get the news that your friend has taken their own life, you freeze. Everything you have been working on, learning, and achieving, stops. This person you loved, held close in your heart, and cared for is no longer here. Questions rush through your mind. Guilt, regret, confusion, shock, sadness, and anger all jump within your mind. You wonder where you went wrong, how you could have prevented their death, and have so many regrets. Parts of you wish you knew they were struggling so much with their mental health. You wish you called them more, texted them you loved them, and told them they weren’t alone. Then, the tears start. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you cope in healthy ways. Wisdom Within Counseling specializes in complex trauma, grief, and loss therapy.
Let yourself feel all your feelings when you lose a friend to suicide
You are sobbing, more than you realize you could cry. You are feeling devastated, torn, confused, and wish you could give them one last hug. Your mind is distracted and you can’t concentrate on your work day. Every memory you have shared together floods your mind. You hope that those memories mattered to them. The pain, the loss, and the grief is more real than you every could have imagined. You start scrolling through photos of you and your friend on your camera roll. They were happy. You used to do fun things together. There are so many good memories to your relationship together. The silly snapshots, the videos of them dancing like nobody was watching, and the selfies. Every part of your heart hurts. Your throat gets tight.
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Therapy when coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you process your questions
It is okay to feel confused and question everything. You wonder if you are permitted to share this news with another friend. Is this private information? Should you protect their privacy?
How did you not know they were in such pain? Why didn’t they call you or reach out? How could they have felt you didn’t care when you loved them so much? Is a social media tribute post appropriate? Are there other friends you have that are suffering in silence or feeling hopeless?
What can you do to be supportive of their family? Did medication get changed? How could this have happened? Who is to blame?
Why didn’t someone stop this from happening? Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you talk about these valid questions. In times of grief and loss, it is common to want answers.
Therapy can support acceptance skills and positive coping strategies for grief.
Losing a friend to suicide is beyond sad and traumatizing.
Mental health is tender, and the grieving process is not easy. Coping with a friend who takes their own life can shatter your world.
One day, you know you can call your friend for advice and support. The next, you learn that they are no longer living. You are shocked, in disbelief, and some moments, can’t believe what is happening.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you get in touch with yourself
Shock is normal in your grieving process. It is okay that you feel numb. When you talk, it feels like someone else is speaking the words you say. Food has lost its flavor. Your tongue feels dry. And, your throat hurts. Being in shock and in disbelief is a normal part of coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you breathe deeply through this heartbreak, grief, and pain. It is okay to feel detached and numb to the things to have to do. Maybe, you have to drive somewhere. Or, you have to pick your children up from school and act happy. Perhaps, you have to purchase a flight and spend a day traveling to their funeral or wake. Don’t beat yourself up if you feel that you are in a daze and keep thinking, “I can’t believe this is real.”
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Guilt is a normal part of counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide
When you are surviving a friend who dies by suicide, it is common to feel guilt. You may feel guilty that you didn’t do enough to help them feel your love. As well, you may feel guilty that you weren’t there to save their life. Parts of you may feel guilty for not even knowing they were in such a dark place mentally. You may feel that you could have prevented their death by suicide in some way. Your mind may be filled with, “If only I did…,” thoughts. Perhaps, guilt creeps in alongside sadness and grief. It is normal to wonder if there was something more you could have said or done out of guilt.
You may even feel guilty that you never had a change to say goodbye. Therapy for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you accept that they may not have been anything you could have done. No matter what, counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you accept the things outside of your control. Your friend may have been in a very dark place mentally.
No matter what you could have done or said, they may have already made their mind up about suicide. When you are an empathetic person, it is normal to struggle with blame. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you cope in healthy ways when you are dealing with guilt. At Wisdom Within Counseling, you can heal from loss and complex grief using creative therapies. Art, yoga, music therapies, painting, and walking by the beach can be healing. In addition to talk therapy, you may want creative, holistic, mind body options. These creative, holistic, mind body therapies help you express the complex emotions you are experiencing. Drumming or making a sound in music therapy can be a powerful release for grief. As well, moving your body through gentle yoga poses can be a positive way to cope with losing a friend to suicide.
What does coping with losing a friend to suicide in counseling look like?
When you have a friend who took their own life, it is normal to have a multitude of emotions. Anger, loss, fear, anxiety, confusion, guilt, regret, and more surface. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you release these intense emotions. You can release and cope in healthy ways. Your therapist can help you take good care of your mind, body, and spirit during this challenging time. At times, you may stay awake through the middle of the night with sadness on your mind. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you use mindfulness meditation skills to calm your mind.
Using tools like daily exercise, sleep routines, eating regular meals, and socializing can help you get through this difficult time. As well, you may need to take a few days to a few weeks off from work. This way, you can collect yourself, process grief, and work with a therapist who can support coping tools. At Wisdom Within Counseling, we offer therapy for coping with losing a friend to suicide. Painting, yoga, meditation, and outdoor walking therapies can all be part of your counseling experience.
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you release anger
When thinking about stages of grief, anger is very common. It is normal to feel angry or blame someone that didn’t prevent this death. You might also be angry with your friend who took their own life by suicide. It is okay to miss your friend terribly while also feeling angry with them. Holding on to anger will not be helpful. Rather, counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you process and release anger.
It is okay to feel torn and angry after losing a friend to suicide.
You might be angry with someone, something, or with a series of events that happened. For instance, if your friend recently went through a break up, you may naturally feel angry at their ex partner for breaking up with them. If your friend recently failed a class or lost their job, you may feel angry towards their professor or their employer. Or, if your friend was in the hands of a medical professional, you may feel angry at their doctor.
How not to cope with losing a friend to suicide?
Negative coping mechanisms may include getting drunk, developing alcoholism, or using drugs. As well, addictive behaviors do not allow you to process what you are feeling and only mask the pain. You may also feel angry, upset, or suffer from mood swings. Avoid taking your emotional pain out on other loved ones.
At times, you may not know how to communicate what you need due to complex trauma. So, you may end up yelling or expressing anger in an aggressive manor. Instead, counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you communicate what you need. You might need space, or you might need a friend to come over to your home simply for company. Identifying your needs can be part of counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
It may be difficult to accept your friend is no longer living.
Healing when you have lost a good friend to suicide means breathing into what you are feeling. Feel each emotion and journal about what you are experiencing.
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Crying when you need and want to cry is very positive. Being around other people who can celebrate your friend’s life can be healing too. Surround yourself with other people who remember your friend.
Talk about the fun times you had together and the silly things that made them who they were.
Share photos together and take the time to connect on a spiritual level to your friend.
Journaling about all the times you shared can be very positive.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you connect to them spiritually
Even though your friend no longer has a physical presence, they have a spiritual presence. Think about what reminds you of your friend and you can see as a way to connect to them. For instance, if your friend loved blueberry pie, perhaps, blueberry pie can be a reminder of them. Or, if your friend loved rainbows, every time you see a rainbow, you can feel them near by.
Other common symbols of a loved one giving you hope from the spiritual world can be cardinals or butterflies. You don’t have to be religious to connect to your friend in these spiritual ways. Spiritual connection to your friend can keep you going. When you are struggling, you might see a symbol of them giving you hope. Finding a sense of spiritual connection to your friend can help you choose to keep communication alive with them. To add, talking about the good memories in therapy can help you keep your friend’s memory alive.
Learning to let go of the feelings of loss and grief in healthy ways can be part of therapy. Art, yoga, meditation, painting, or going for a walking therapy session can be positive way to cope with losing a friend to suicide. As well, losing a friend to suicide can retrigger past losses. When you lose a friend to suicide, you may feel other losses come back up. Perhaps, you lost a child, parent, or pet, and your friend’s death causes lingering losses to arise.
Seek therapy for coping with losing a friend to suicide to find hope
Loss and grief can lead to deep depression, anxiety attacks, insomnia, appetite changes, and mood swings. Using coping tools can help you process what you are feeling in healthy ways. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you feel hopeful. Hope and acceptance are key parts in healing after losing a friend to suicide. To note, hope and acceptance are not equivalent to forgetting your friend’s memory. Acceptance means you can come to terms with what has happened and this tragedy. Even though this loss was unexpected and tragic, you can take back your own life’s power.
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you accept and feel grateful for your own life
For example, you may realize there is someone else in your life that you would miss if they weren’t there anymore. Losing a friend to suicide can inspire you to reach out to others. You may want to tell your family and friend that you love them.
Maybe, you start expressing and verbalizing how much you cherish your friends and family more clearly. Losing a friend to suicide can make you want to check items off your bucket list. Maybe, you realize life is so short and you want to start traveling the world. There may have been a country that your friend who died by suicide always wanted to visit. So, now you book that flight to travel there and see that place in their honor.
Get a tattoo as a way to cope with losing a friend to suicide
As well, some people choose to get a tattoo in honor of their friend’s memory. A common tattoo the symbolizes suicide awareness is the semi colon (;) tattoo. For instance, you may get a ; tattoo to symbolize mental health and suicide awareness. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you identify how you want to honor your friend. There is no wrong or right way to honor the memory of your friend who died by suicide. Grief healing is different for each person.
You may begin to live like everyday could be your last in your friend’s honor.
Losing a friend to suicide can also cause people to want to have a child or start a family in another way. Therefore, you may have a desire to start a family of your own, get pregnant, have a baby, foster a child, or adopt. You might even name your child after your friend who passed away. Other people choose to honor their friend who died by suicide by planting a tree in their backyard. If your friend loved peaches, you might plant a peach tree in their honor.
Another way to honor and remember your friend you died by suicide can be to put an engraved brick along your walkway. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you choose to keep on living. You can remember the good times you had with your friend, while also living your life to the fullest.
To begin, book a phone consult below at grief counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide.
Reach out for emergency help if your feel suicidal yourself
It is important to know that suicide can be contagious. Since your friend has died by suicide, it is more frequent than not that others start having suicidal thoughts. When one person takes their own life by suicide, it can create a ripple effect in others.
Know that learning your friend died by suicide can cause you and others to feel suicidal. There are many other options besides suicide when you feel sad, overwhelmed, angry, hurt, and more. So, if you feel suicidal or have suicidal thoughts yourself, to goto your local emergency room immediately. Don’t wait, and focus on checking yourself into your local hospital. This way, you can be monitored by professionals until you are mentally stable. Even though you may not have a suicide plan or act on suicidal thoughts, still check yourself with your local hospital for monitoring. In the United States, you can call 998 for the suicide and crisis lifeline to talk to someone.
Call 911 if you don’t know what else to do when you feel suicidal. Address suicidal thoughts right away by seeking professional help. Calling your friends is not always the best option. You may be feeling suicidal in the middle of the night when your friends are sleeping and can’t physically be there for you. Emergency services such as 911, and going to a hospital to get assessed is what may save your life.
Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can help you process all feelings
After losing an amazing friend to suicide, you may feel distress. Along with distress, you feel unsure of how to react. Parts of you know that certain religions and cultures treat and look at suicide differently. You don’t want your friend to be stigmatized for taking their own life. Counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide can be a safe, confidential palce to discuss suicide. Creating a support network that encourages and normalizes talking about suicide can be very helpful. Know that it is okay to feel torn about wanting to talk about suicide and bring awareness to this topic and feeling the need to protect your friend’s privacy.
If someone asks you about your friend, it is okay to let them know who to reach out to for information when to don’t feel comfortable talking about it. As well, it is normal to become tearful when someone asks you about your friend due to the sadness, grief, and emotional pain. If you don’t feel like you can talk, just say, “I can’t talk about this right now.”
Helping families cope
Suicide impacts the whole family. Loss of a loved one to suicide can cause children to need play therapy. Parents may need to process their own feelings. Family therapy sessions can help families come to terms with suicide. When a close friend who takes their own life, it can feel like a family member has died. Everyone who knew the person who took their own life may react differently. Healing looks differently for each person. Focus on what your healing process looks like and take good care of yourself.
Wisdom With Counseling offers a holistic, creative approach to healing after grief. Loss is like a roller coaster. Some days are easier than others. Finding a professional therapist who you can talk to can help ease the pain. Counseling can also teach you self-regulation tools and positive coping skills. Never feel that you have to rush you grief healing process. You should never feel that you have to “Get Over It.”
Therapy can be a safe, confidential space for you to come to terms with this unexpected, painful, and shocking loss.
You can learn to live your life to the fullest in honor of your friend. At Wisdom Within Counseling, art therapies, yoga therapies, music therapies, and outdoor walking therapies support grief recovery. Painting, using modeling clay, or going for a walk with your therapist by the beach can help you cope in healthy ways.
If you are looking for counseling for coping with losing a friend to suicide, you are not alone. The team at Wisdom Within Counseling specializes in complex trauma, grief, loss, and holistic coping tools.
