Is one of you neurodivergent? Are you feeling emotionally disconnected in your marriage? Is sex off the table—or a source of anxiety, shutdown, or frustration? Has ADHD, autism or sensory processing disorder been negatively impacting your relationship? Feeling like roommates? Do you identify as a highly sensitive person, that feels emotions more deeply than others? As well, do you or your spouse get overwhelmed easily, struggle with emotional expression, or misinterpret each other’s tone, facial expressions, or intentions? These may be signs that one—or both—of you are neurodivergent. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
When you want to talk, connect, or just be reassured that you matter, your spouse pulls away, avoids you, and that rejection hurts so much.
As a couple, you may be wondering: Am I neurotypical or neurodivergent? What does that even mean?
Neurodivergence refers to brains that function differently than the societal norm—often in ways that are sensory-sensitive, emotionally intense, or non-linear.
This includes diagnoses like ADHD, autism spectrum disorder (ASD), sensory processing differences, and being a highly sensitive person (HSP).
Neurodivergence also frequently goes undiagnosed. This is especially true in women, nonbinary individuals, and emotionally intelligent men. If you have a great job or career, you may appear neurotypical. This makes it hard to name what’s really going on in your relationship.
If you’re neurotypical, you might find yourself constantly confused or frustrated by your partner’s emotional shutdowns. Their seeming disinterest in sex really causes you feelings of rejection. Or, when they have trouble staying present during conversations, it hurts you. You feel ignored and unimportant.
Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, ADHD, autism, and sensory processing disorder.
You may feel rejected, invisible, or unloved—when in reality, your neurodivergent spouse might be overwhelmed by sensory input, emotionally flooded, or unsure how to express love in the way you need.
If you’re the neurodivergent partner, you might feel constantly criticized or misunderstood, even when you’re trying your hardest to connect. You may need more structure, time, or gentler touch. But, you feel too ashamed or embarrassed to say so.
As a certified sex therapy informed professional, Gottman Level Two trained marriage therapist, and emotionally focused couples therapist, I specialize in helping neurodivergent couples decode their emotional and sexual disconnect.
With over 500 hours of somatic yoga therapy for trauma, I use body-based, sensory-friendly tools to help you both feel safe, heard, and grounded in your relationship.
Marriage counseling and couples therapy with me, Katie Ziskind, helps you both understand how your neurodivergent needs shape communication, intimacy, and conflict.
Whether one of you experiences ADHD time blindness or sensory overload in the bedroom—or the other has high expectations around emotional availability and sexual spontaneity—we will explore these patterns together. If you are a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, you are in the right place. In marriage therapy, you’ll learn how to create rituals of connection that work for your unique brains.
Sometimes, one partner needs more time to process after an argument, while the other wants to resolve it right away. When your spouse pulls away when you want to talk, this triggers fears of abandonment. As well, one of you might crave emotional closeness while your neurodivergent spouse feels smothered. These differences don’t mean you’re incompatible.
They just mean your nervous systems are wired differently. You need tools to create bridges between your emotional worlds. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
In therapy for neurodivergent relationships, we’ll also talk about sexual intimacy.
To note, many neurodivergent couples experience rejection, avoidance, or shutdown around sex. You feel unsure of how to break this pattern.
This doesn’t mean the desire for sex isn’t there. It may just be buried under shame, performance pressure, sensory issues, or fear of being “too much” or “not enough.” In marriage therapy specialized neurodivergent relationships, you’ll learn how to build sexual safety. You can talk about what sexual safety means for you both. And, you can practice consent-based touch, that does not need to end in penetrative sex. You can incorporate more affectionate touch, that is non-sexual. And, you can learn to reconnect through playful, pressure-free intimacy.
You don’t have to keep feeling like roommates, walking on eggshells, or stuck in repetitive fights.
Neurodivergence doesn’t have to be a barrier to love or a healthy marriage.
In reality, neurodivergence can be the exact thing that makes your relationship deeper. From marriage counseling, you can see your neurodivergence as a positive thing. You both gain compassion and you both gain an understanding for how your brains work.
Book your 90-minute telehealth video intake now to begin your journey into emotional and sexual healing.
You can view my schedule online and find a time that works for you. Let’s rebuild trust, laughter, desire, and emotional intimacy—together. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
You both deserve a relationship that feels safe, nourishing, and deeply connected, no matter how your brains are wired.
Why are neurodivergent neurotypical relationships are so hard for more general therapists?
Neurodivergent–neurotypical relationships are uniquely beautiful—and uniquely complex.
If you’re in a neurodivergent marriage, you are in the right place.
You already know: the disconnection on the surface runs much deeper. There is emotional pain. Rejection and emotional distance hurt. There may be sensory overload aspects too. Marriage therapy can help you decipher that what appears to be selfishness might really be anxiety or an avoidant attachment style. Attachment styles are a huge part of working with Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor, specializing in neurodivergent relationships. And yet, many general therapists miss these patterns completely.
That’s why working with a specialist like Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching makes such a powerful difference.
Most therapists are trained with neurotypical assumptions in mind: that couples speak the same emotional language. With neurotypical couples, therapy works differently. Neurotypical couples tend to regulate the same way, and respond to the same kinds of intimacy-building tools.
But in a neurodivergent–neurotypical dynamic, this simply isn’t true. Each neurodivergent person had their own sensory needs, emotional needs, and sensitivities. Your neurodivergent partner may need more structure, space, or verbal clarity.
One of the most common patterns, you may crave emotional connection. But, your spouse may be emotionally flooded and shutting down.
When your spouse pulls away and withdraws, your fear of abandonment and fear of being left gets triggered.
Without a therapist who understands how neurodivergence actually works, therapy can feel invalidating—or worse, it can make things even more painful.
Katie Ziskind specializes in working with neurodivergent couples. She helps couples here one or both partners may have ADHD, autism spectrum disorder (ASD), sensory processing differences, or traits of a highly sensitive person (HSP). Katie Ziskind assesses and embraces your unique, neurodivergent traits.
She understands how these traits show up in daily life. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships who see how these traits pop up in arguments, and sexual intimacy. She sees beyond the surface-level conflict and gets to the emotional roots. In marriage counseling, she guides you in communicating what is beneath anger. Often, hidden beneath anger are feelings of shame, anxiety, avoiding, masking, and unmet needs for safety.
Katie Ziskind specializes with couples who are struggling with neurodivergence, ADHD, ASD, sensory processing disorder, highly sensitive person, leading to anxiety, sexual rejection, disinterest in sex, and avoidance.
In traditional couples therapy, you might be told you’re “overreacting,” “not trying hard enough.” This is not Katie Ziskind’s approach. Or, a non trained couples counselor may say that your spouse is “emotionally unavailable.” Hearing these negative assumptions are painful and make you feel hopeless. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships. She provides you with a structured path forward, and with expert guidance.
To note, Katie Ziskind uses a neurodivergent-affirming lens that honors your emotional experience.
When you identify as neurodivergent, she gently helps your partner learn how to show up with more presence, patience, and care. This isn’t about blame or fixing each other. Rather, marriage counseling is about education, nervous system regulation, and learning how to truly connect across your differences.
Katie Ziskind blends Gottman Method tools, Emotionally Focused Therapy, and over 500 hours of somatic yoga therapy training to help couples like you reconnect emotionally and sexually. You’ll learn to slow down, name your triggers, build sensory-safe intimacy, and communicate in ways that work for both your brains.
We also don’t get emotional safety skills growing up. So, couples counseling can be the first time you both talk openly about emotions, sexual desires, and building a secure attachment.
If sex has become a source of shutdown, rejection, or avoidance, she’ll help you rebuild safety, connection, and desire without pressure or shame.
You might be feeling alone, frustrated, or even hopeless—like your partner lives in a completely different emotional universe. But, you’re not broken. You just need an expert guide who understands both of your needs and how to bridge the gap between them.
Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
Why work with an ADHD, autism, neurodivergent, highly sensitive person specialist at Wisdom Within Counseling?
At Wisdom Within Counseling, Katie Ziskind creates a safe space for both partners to be seen and understood. Co-occuring diagnoses are part of what brings you closer.
Maybe, you’re neurotypical and feel confused by your partner’s avoidance or emotional shutdown.
Or, you’re neurodivergent and feel misunderstood or constantly overstimulated—therapy helps you both rebuild emotional safety and deepen your bond.
Your marriage deserves more than generic advice. Really, your marriage is a unique, special bond. And, your marriage deserves specialized support that honors how your brains, bodies, and nervous systems really work. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
Book your 90-minute telehealth intake session with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
She helps you both feel understood, heard, valuable, appreciated, and important to each other. We do not get skills or instruction on how to do this growing up or through culture. Specializing in neurodivergent relationships, you get direct emotional guidance. She knows how to nurture neurotypical sensitivities and sensory aspects in couples counseling. Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, supports you both in building a secure attachment.
You can view her real-time schedule and choose a time that works for both of you.
Don’t wait to repair the emotional distance, sexual disconnection, and anxiety in your relationship.
The right kind of couples therapy makes all the difference—especially when it’s designed for your unique relationship.
The Tragic Dance of the Neurodiverse Couple: Why You Feel So Misunderstood—and How Katie Ziskind Helps You Reconnect
If you’re in a relationship where one or both of you are neurodivergent—living with ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing disorder, or highly sensitive wiring—you may hurt, rejected, unimportant, and hopeless. You already feel the tragic, heartbreaking dance happening over and over again.
It’s not that you don’t love each other. But, right now, you keep missing each other emotionally. You try, you reach. But, your efforts get tangled in misunderstanding, overwhelm, the silent treatment, anger and anxiety.
This is what therapists call the tragic dance of the neurodiverse couple.
It starts like this: You’re craving emotional closeness.
You want to talk, connect, or just be reassured that you matter.
But, when you reach out, your neurodivergent spouse may seem distant, distracted, or even irritated. You feel rejected and hurt. Then, you begin to wonder, Why won’t they talk to me? Or, why do I always have to initiate affection or sex?
The more you try to bring your partner closer, the more they seem to pull away. This pattern is painful and very common with neurodivergent couples.
Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
From the neurodivergent partner’s side, it’s a different story.
So, why does you neurodivergent spouse with ADHD, autism, or sensory processing disorder avoid and withdraw? They might be feeling overwhelmed by noise, sensation, unspoken pressure, or emotional intensity they don’t know how to handle. Growing up, they never learned how to identify and express their feelings.
Your neurodivergent spouse might shut down—not because they don’t care, but because their nervous system is on overload. Maybe, part of your fight cycle reminds them of the pain, shame guilt, anger, and powerlessness in their childhood.
They may have narcissistic, emotionally abusive parents who did understand their neurodivergence either. So, couples counseling becomes a safe place to understand and embrace neurodivergent traits. As well, your neurodivergent spouse may misread your tone or facial expression. And, they assume they’ve already failed. They set unrealistic, rigid expectations of themselves. Couples therapy can help with flexible thinking skills.
When a neurodivergent person pulls away, their inner world is often a swirling mix of shame, confusion, and anxiety. And, all mixed with deep love that they don’t quite know how to express or verbalize.
So you want closeness, and they withdraw. They retreat, and you feel rejected.
You both feel abandoned, hurt, and you need the help of a neurodivergent specialist who understand couples.
This cycle is incredibly painful—and often gets worse when sex enters the picture.
One partner might feel unwanted, sexually rejected, or starved for intimacy. The other may feel guilt-ridden, disconnected from their body, or anxious about being touched. Eventually, you end up feeling like roommates, or enemies. Or like you’re living in parallel universes that never quite overlap.
This is where Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, comes in.
As a certified sex therapy-informed professional, a Gottman Level Two marriage therapist, and an emotionally focused couples therapist, Katie has helped hundreds of neurodiverse couples untangle this painful dance.
She understands that what looks like avoidance or apathy is often a trauma response, a sensory reaction, or the legacy of growing up neurodivergent in a neurotypical world.
What are trauma responses and how do they play a role with neurodivergent couples?
In neurodivergent relationships, fight, flight, and freeze responses can show up more frequently and intensely—especially during conflict, emotional overwhelm, or sexual disconnection.
If you or your partner are living with ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing sensitivity, or identify as a highly sensitive person, your nervous system may react more quickly to stress. Maybe, you both get reactive, angry, or triggered more than you would like. This is often from having painful traumatic experiences in childhood and adolescent years.
You’re not trying to overreact or push your spouse away. But, your body is simply doing what it’s wired to do: protect you.
What is the fight response?
If your trauma response is fight, you may become defensive, irritable, or raise your voice when you feel hurt or misunderstood. You might try to control the situation so you don’t feel vulnerable.
In a neurodivergent couple, this might look like one partner interrupting. Or, it looks like criticizing, or insisting on being right—not out of malice, but out of panic that the emotional ground beneath them is crumbling.
Let’s talk about flight responses to trauma.
If your response is flight, you might avoid the conversation altogether, leave the room, or go silent. You might throw yourself into work, chores, or screens to escape the discomfort. When you avoid conflict, you stay super busy. Avoiding conflict isn’t a healthy and damages your couple bubble bond.
Many neurodivergent partners use intellectualizing, overthinking, or “fixing” behavior as a way to flee emotionally from connection. Rather than fleeing or a flight response, Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, teaches you how to talk about intense feelings.
The partner on the other end of the avoidance feels emotionally abandoned.
If your response is freeze, you may shut down completely.
You might go numb, dissociate, or find yourself unable to speak. Freeze is like a raccoon in headlights. This can be especially common if you’ve experienced childhood trauma or were punished for expressing emotions growing up.
In a freeze state after trauma, you’re not lazy or disinterested. You’re frozen in fear, confusion, or sensory overload. As well, your partner may not understand why you’ve “disappeared” or “gone silent” during important moments. And, having a freeze response to trauma can create painful disconnection in your marraige.
Katie Ziskind, a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, deeply understands these trauma responses.
As well, at Wisdom Within Counseling, you get a therapist who understands how they intersect with sensory sensitivities, communication struggles, and emotional intensity.
She doesn’t treat you like you’re broken. Katie Ziskind helps you understand how your unique brain and body are trying to protect you. You can appreciate how these survival mechanisms helped you survive childhood trauma. And, in marriage therapy, you can learn how to safely reconnect after disconnection.
Working with Katie Ziskind means you finally have a guide who gets what it’s like to be a couple with different sensory and emotional needs.
She offers a calm, nonjudgmental space where each of you can express your inner world, understand your nervous system, and learn tools to regulate together. In marriage therapy, you’ll learn how to pause during a fight. As well, in couples therapy, you how to soothe each other when flooded. And, you learn how to rebuild trust after moments of rupture.
This isn’t surface-level advice. This is deep, healing, trauma-informed couples work that can completely shift how you relate to each other.
Whether you’ve been stuck in conflict cycles, avoiding intimacy, or walking on eggshells, working with Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you finally feel safe, seen, and understood—together.
If you’re tired of therapists who don’t understand your neurodivergent world, it’s time to work with someone who does.
Book your 90-minute video intake session now and start learning how to co-regulate, rebuild safety, and nurture your relationship in ways that actually work for your unique minds and hearts.
Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, is passionate about teaching emotional bonding skills after trauma.
In her work with couples struggling with ADHD, ASD, HSP traits, and sensory processing differences, she doesn’t just teach you how to “communicate better.”
She helps you understand why your communication styles are clashing in the first place. Katie Ziskind helps you regulate your nervous systems, slow down, and create rituals of emotional safety. She’ll guide you into discovering new ways to reconnect—emotionally, physically, and sexually—without pressure or shame.
Katie also works with the sexual pain and rejection cycles that are common in neurodivergent relationships.
She helps you rebuild desire in a way that’s pressure-free and playful. Instead of “performing” sexually, you’ll learn how to co-create intimacy based on consent, curiosity, and emotional attunement.
At Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching, Katie Ziskind creates a space where both partners—neurotypical or neurodivergent—feel seen, understood, and safe. You’ll begin to rewrite the dance steps of your relationship.
Instead of chasing and avoiding, criticizing and shutting down, you’ll build new rhythms that support closeness, stability, and emotional intimacy.
If you’re ready to stop feeling misunderstood, unwanted, or stuck, book your 90-minute telehealth video intake session with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
You can view her online schedule. Choose a time that works for you, and take that first step toward healing your relationship.
You deserve more than survival. And, you deserve a love that honors your unique brain and helps you feel safe, cherished, and deeply connected—every day.
How does sexual trauma in college, sexual abuse in childhood, unwanted touch, raped, molested, ect, impact a neurodiverse person and their sex life?
Sexual trauma—whether it happened in college, childhood, or through unwanted touch, rape, or molestation—can deeply and lastingly shape your relationship with your own body. As well, sexual abuse impacts your nervous system, and your experience of intimacy. For neurodiverse individuals, who already experience the world more intensely—through sensory processing differences, social anxiety, or emotional overwhelm—sexual trauma can be especially destabilizing.
Sex becomes scary after trauma.
You might freeze when your partner touches you, even when you love them.
Or, you might dissociate, go numb, or feel like you’re not even in your body anymore. You might feel shame for having no sexual desire, or guilt for saying “no” again.
Your partner might feel confused, rejected, or helpless—especially if they don’t understand the invisible trauma your body is holding.
This creates emotional distance and pressure that only deepens the disconnect.
If you’re neurodivergent—living with ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing disorder, or as a highly sensitive person—your body and nervous system are already wired for heightened awareness.
With ADHD, autism, and neurodivergent traits, certain touch already feels too intense. Unexpected movements, smells, or sounds during intimacy can be jarring. Then, add in unwanted touch, sexual trauma, and sexual abuse experiences. After sexual trauma, your system becomes even more hyper-vigilant. Due to abuse and neglect in childhood and teenage years, you are always canning for danger. You don’t want to get hurt again. So, your trauma symptoms are in high alreart, anticipating abandonment, hurt, pain or loss of control.
What should feel safe (sexual touch and being desired) and intimate feels like a threat.
After sexual trauma and sexual abuse experiences, even seemingly simple moments, like cuddling can be something a survivor avoids.
Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, is passionate helping couples re-associate safety and pleasure with touch and sex after trauma. This might mean starting slow and showering together. Washing each other’s hair in the shower can be a soothing, nurturing, and relaxing way to start. But, jumping right to spontaneous kissing can trigger a trauma response. Your body remembers what your brain has tried to forget.
After trauma, you may want to connect, but your nervous system says, “This isn’t safe.”
The result? Avoidance, disinterest in sex, panic attacks before intimacy, or a complete shutdown of your sexual self.
You may begin to believe that you’re broken. Or, you have a avoided sex for so long that your sexless marriage is normal. Maybe, you think that you’ll never enjoy sex again, and don’t even care about it either. But, your spouse wants to make love to you, and they feel confused.
But, you are not broken. You are responding exactly how a trauma-impacted, neurodiverse body protects itself: by bracing, numbing, or fleeing.
These fight, flight, and freeze trauma responses are survival strategies, not flaws. And, with the right kind of help, you can slowly, gently, safely reconnect to your body and your partner.
Katie Ziskind specializes in helping neurodivergent individuals and couples heal from the intersection of trauma and intimacy.
At Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching, she offers a deeply attuned, body-aware, sex-positive approach that honors your sensory needs, your emotional story, and your desire to feel safe again in your body.
She blends somatic yoga therapy, trauma-informed care, Gottman couples therapy, and emotionally focused therapy to gently help you and your partner rebuild trust and safety.
You’ll learn that sex doesn’t have to be goal-oriented. Through marriage counseling, you can talk openly and comfortably about sex. You can learn that sex don’t just mean penis in vagina sex.
As well, talking about sex doesn’t mean you have to go have it either. Really, talking about sex is about removing and overcoming guilt, anxiety, insecurity, pressure, shame, overwhelm, avoidance, and inadequacy. You can a safe place to express your sexuality, talk about desire, and consent. As well, couples counseling is a place to understand that you both deserve sexual pleasure, and it isn’t sinful.
Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, and is a sex and sexuality educator.
Sex doesn’t have to mean penetration. It doesn’t even have to mean touching at first.
Through sessions with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, you and your partner can redefine intimacy.
Maybe, it starts with eye contact, hand-holding, or learning how to say “yes” and “no” with clarity and confidence. Together, in marriage therapy, you’ll create a new map that includes sexual consent, play, and softness. Rather than sex being about fear or expectation, sex becomes about play and emotional connection. A healthy sex life is not about fear, pressure, or shame. Building a healthy sex life is about a deep emotional connection.
Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, is passionate helping couples with ADHD, autism, and sensory process disorder co-create physical intimacy.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, in neurodivergent specialized marriage therapy, you get a space where both of you are supported.
If you’re the one healing from trauma, you’ll never be rushed. And, if you’re the supportive partner, you’ll learn how to show up with patience, presence, and tools to reduce reactivity.
You’ll both understand how neurodivergence and trauma interact. And, you can learn how to build a sex life that feels emotionally and physically safe again.
You deserve a relationship where you feel safe being touched. And, marriage counseling is a safe place to talk about a secure, safe physical bond. You deserve to heal your connection to sexual pleasure, to your body, and to your partner.
Book your 90-minute telehealth intake session with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
You can view her real-time schedule and choose a time that works.
This is the first step to moving from fear and freeze into trust, warmth, and true emotional and sexual intimacy—on your terms.
Talk about sex openly in marriage therapy for neurodivergent couples.
When you and your partner are living with neurodivergence—whether that’s ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing disorder, or being a highly sensitive person—your relationship and sex life can feel confusing. Emotionally and sexually, you may feel pain, rejection, and disconnection.
Especially around sex and intimacy, you know you need the help of a neurodivergent couples therapist. You might deeply love each other. But, you feel worlds apart when it comes to physical affection, emotional closeness, and sexual desire.
And unfortunately, many general therapists simply don’t have the training to help you navigate this unique intersection of neurodiversity, sensory needs, and intimacy.
At Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching, Katie Ziskind offers couples therapy specifically designed for neurodivergent couples like you.
This isn’t cookie-cutter therapy.
This is a sex-positive, trauma-informed, and neurodiversity-affirming space where you can finally talk about sex—openly, without shame, guilt, fear, or pressure.
In your relationship, sex might have become a point of conflict, avoidance, or confusion.
One of you might want more sex while your partner feels overwhelmed by even the idea of being touched.
You might argue about porn, or feel misunderstood when you ask for emotional closeness first.
If you’re a neurodivergent woman, you may struggle to connect with your body due to past trauma, shame, or sensory overload.
In sessions with Katie Ziskind, you’ll learn how to talk about sex in a way that’s compassionate, curious, and respectful of your nervous system.
You’ll learn how to understand what your body actually needs to feel safe and aroused.
That might include longer, slower, emotionally connected foreplay—not just physical touch, but verbal reassurance, acts of service, humor, safety, and trust-building moments throughout the day.
If you’re the partner of someone neurodivergent, you might feel rejected, anxious, or unsure how to approach them without triggering a shutdown.
You’ll also begin to understand how porn can create unrealistic and often harmful expectations—especially in neurodiverse relationships.
Katie Ziskind helps you and your partner untangle these expectations and focus on what’s real, consensual, and pleasurable for you.
You’ll stop trying to “perform” and start co-creating an erotic connection that feels nourishing and safe.
Sex positivity means celebrating sexual pleasure, honoring consent, and embracing emotional vulnerability—not just avoiding shame.
With Katie Ziskind, you’ll explore female sexual pleasure, how long it actually takes a woman to become aroused (typically 45-90 minutes of emotional and physical buildup), and how anxiety, stress, and trauma responses impact libido.
You’ll also talk about how neurodivergence makes you more sensitive to these things—and how to work with, not against, your nervous system.
For example, if you have sensory processing disorder, sex might feel overstimulating unless the lights are dim, the sheets are soft, and you’ve had time to decompress.
If you have ADHD, you may find yourself distracted, restless, or disconnected from your body—and feel guilty or misunderstood for it.
And, if you’re autistic or highly sensitive, emotional intimacy may feel more important than any physical touch at all. You might want to have a long conversation about your feelings, your day, your worries, and talk first. For you, emotional conversations help you feel important and like you matter. Then, you might feel sexual desire increase.
In couples therapy with Katie Ziskind, you and your partner will learn to speak each other’s sensory and emotional love languages.
You’ll stop guessing what’s wrong and start learning what works—how to create safety cues, how to check in, how to respond with kindness instead of shutdown.
This is where desire can be rebuilt—not through pressure, but through presence.
Most importantly, you’ll start to feel like a team again. Katie Ziskind helps you rebuild your couple bubble. Furthermore, your couple bubble is that protective emotional space that allows you to face the world together.
Within a healthy, thriving, secure bubble, you can be your full, neurodiverse selves.
You’ll learn how to have hard conversations with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships. Instead of avoiding conflict, you can learn to resolve conflict through counseling.
From marriage therapy, you can learn how to hold space for each other’s trauma. And, you learn how to co-regulate during moments of anxiety or sensory overload.
You don’t have to keep living in silence, anxiety, avoidance, confusion, or rejection.
Schedule your 90-minute video intake session to begin marriage counseling and couples therapy designed for neurodivergent couples like you.
Together, you’ll create a roadmap for emotional closeness, sexual safety, and a thriving, connected relationship that works for your beautiful, complex, unique brains.
How does religious shame and guilt impact neurodivergent couples?
Couples therapy that specializes in neurodivergence—including ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing disorder, and the highly sensitive person—can also be a deeply healing space to process religious trauma that’s affected your sexuality.
When you combine neurodivergence with a history of being raised in a rigid or shame-based religious environment, sex can become something that feels confusing, scary, or even sinful—even inside a loving, committed marriage.
At Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching, Katie Ziskind offers a sex-positive, neurodivergence-affirming, and trauma-informed space for you and your partner to talk honestly about your fears, your past, and your desires.
This includes the effects of religious trauma, which may have told you that sex is bad, your body is shameful, or that women are responsible for managing men’s sexual thoughts and behaviors. These messages can deeply damage your ability to experience intimacy in a healthy, joyful way.
You might have been taught that sex is only for reproduction, and that pleasure is selfish.
Or maybe you were told to stay “pure” and now, even though you’re married, you feel like you’re doing something wrong when you enjoy your body and sex.
If you’re neurodivergent, these mixed messages can become even more confusing.
You may have taken them very literally. Or, you feel intense anxiety trying to follow religious rules round sex. Also, female sexual pleasure, how to orgasm, and sex was never explained with clarity or compassion.
Some people are told growing up that masturbation is sinful, that your body is a temptation, or that wanting sex means you’re dirty.
For neurodiverse women, especially those who are highly sensitive, this kind of messaging can shut down arousal completely.
You might dissociate during sex. As well, you might feel like you’re “doing something wrong” even with a loving partner.
And if you grew up believing that you’re meant to serve your spouse’s needs, you may have never been taught how to advocate for your own sexual pleasure, or even that you deserve it.
In sex-positive couples therapy with Katie Ziskind, you’ll learn that sex and pleasure is not shameful.
It’s human. You sexuality is sacred. You’ll unpack the damaging beliefs you may have carried for decades. And, begin to replace them with truths that support connection, consent, and equality.
Katie Ziskind helps you and your partner understand that you were not broken for struggling.
You were conditioned to believe that your sexuality wasn’t yours to own.
When religious trauma intersects with neurodivergence, it can cause extreme confusion and guilt.
Maybe you ask yourself, Why do I feel overwhelmed when my partner wants to touch me? And, why do I feel gross when I say yes? These are questions Katie Ziskind helps you explore with deep compassion.
She also helps your partner learn how to support you emotionally. In marriage counseling for neurodivergent couples, you learn how to create safety. You can learn to remove pressure around sex and sexual expression, and how to respond when shame surfaces.
For many couples, religious trauma causes sexual avoidance, mismatched desire, and emotional distance.
One of you may feel rejected, while the other feels panicked, guilty, or frozen.
Through Katie Ziskind’s integrated approach—including Gottman couples therapy, emotionally focused therapy, and 500+ hours of somatic trauma-informed yoga therapy—you’ll begin to build a new framework for your sex life.
In marriage therapy, you develop a sex life rooted in honesty, consent, pleasure, and mutual respect.
You’ll also gain tools for emotional regulation.
For example, if you feel shame or nervousness during foreplay, Katie Ziskind will help you notice what’s happening in your body. You can use positive affirmations to support security, safety, and slow things down.
And, in couples therapy, you can learn how to name those feelings without judgment. If your partner is confused by your reactions, Katie Ziskind teaches them how to listen with empathy, not defensiveness.
You deserve a sex life that feels safe, pleasurable, and empowering. As well, you deserve to feel curious, playful, and emotionally connected in your marriage. From couples counseling, you can break free from the weight of outdated beliefs that made you feel ashamed or less than.
Book your 90-minute telehealth intake session now.
If you’re struggling with religious shame, sexual avoidance, anxiety, or trauma from rigid teachings, you’re not alone. And, with marriage therapy, there’s a healing, sex-positive path forward for both you and your partner.
What is the difference between neurodivergent couples and neurotypical couples?
The difference between neurodivergent couples and neurotypical couples often lies in how you both experience the world. To note, neurodivergent couples and neurotypical couples process emotions, communicate needs, and connect sexually very differently.
If you or your partner are neurodivergent—meaning you live with ADHD, autism spectrum traits, sensory processing disorder, or you’re a highly sensitive person—your relationship may face a completely different set of challenges than a neurotypical couple would.
You might notice that you get overwhelmed more easily—by noise, touch, emotional intensity, or too much stimulation.
Or, maybe you need time to process your feelings internally before talking, while your partner wants to talk it out right away.
These kinds of mismatches can feel frustrating, especially if you don’t yet have the language to explain them.
In neurotypical couples, communication tends to follow more expected social patterns.
But in your neurodivergent relationship, one of you may struggle with eye contact, forget to respond to texts, or seem emotionally “checked out”—even when you deeply care.
This isn’t a lack of love. It’s a difference in neural wiring, which requires compassion, education, and specific tools to bridge the gap.
Emotional intimacy also looks different for neurodivergent couples and neurotypical couples.
As a neurodivergent person, you may feel deeply but struggle to express it, especially if you grew up being misunderstood.
Or, maybe you experience emotional flooding, where a simple disagreement spirals into panic or shutdown.
Your partner might not understand what’s happening and think you’re avoiding the issue—when really, you’re overstimulated and trying to survive the moment. There may also be a cycle of avoidance going on adding an additional layer.
Sexual intimacy can also be more complex for neurodivergent couples.
Neurotypical couples may not have to think much about sensory triggers or emotional safety during sex.
But in your relationship, you may need more foreplay, more reassurance, more time to build trust before physical intimacy feels good.
You might be avoiding sex—not because you don’t love your partner, but because your nervous system feels overloaded. Due to past trauma, sex and touch feels unsafe, or disconnected.
That’s why it’s so important to work with a therapist—like Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling—who understands the unique dynamics of neurodivergent relationships.
You deserve someone who doesn’t pathologize your needs. But, marriage counseling helps you build a relationship that works for your real-life nervous systems, not society’s expectations.
Through marriage counseling and couples therapy designed specifically for neurodivergent couples, you and your partner can learn how to understand each other’s brains.
You can speak each other’s emotional language, and build connection instead of conflict. It’s not about fixing you. Couples therapy with Katie Ziskind about honoring how you’re wired and learning how to connect from that place.
If you’re feeling misunderstood, anxious, or emotionally disconnected, know that you’re not broken—you’re different.
And different needs different support.
Book your 90-minute video intake session now for neurodivergent specialized marriage therapy. Take the first step toward building a relationship where both of you can thrive.
If you’re a highly sensitive person (HSP), it means you feel things more deeply than most people.
Your nervous system is wired to pick up on subtle cues—tones of voice, shifts in mood, even light, noise, or textures.
You might be the person who needs to leave a crowded room because it’s too loud, or the one who notices when your partner is upset before they even say a word.
As a highly sensitive person, you’re wired to pick up on the smallest details—a change in your partner’s tone of voice.
Are you more sensitive to sounds?
Being a highly sensitive person, you notice a sigh that sounds heavier than usual and the way they look away during a conversation. For instance, the sound of the television may feel too loud, Or, the sound of your partner breathing may irritate you more on certain days. Your spouse yelling or raising their voice is really scary to you. And, yelling and anger outbursts impact you negatively for hours afterwards too.
These subtle cues that others might miss can land deeply in your nervous system.
You don’t just hear words; you feel their emotional charge.
Even if your partner says “I’m fine,” you can sense when they’re holding something back—and that tension can leave you feeling anxious or on edge.
Because your nervous system is so finely tuned, conflict can feel overwhelming or even threatening.
You may notice every shift in body language or facial expression during a disagreement. And, a raised voice might make your heart race. A sarcastic tone from your spouse might feel like a knife.
Even if your partner isn’t intentionally being harsh, your body reacts as if something is very wrong.
You might freeze, withdraw, or cry easily. Or, you feel like your emotions spiral quickly.
It’s not that you’re being “too sensitive”—your body is doing its best to protect you from what it perceives as danger.
In conflict, you probably want resolution and emotional safety more than anything, but your overwhelm can make it hard to speak clearly.
You may shut down because everything feels “too much,” or you may become intensely emotional because your feelings are flooding your system.
Meanwhile, your partner—especially if they’re less sensitive—might feel confused or frustrated, not understanding why you’re reacting so strongly. This disconnect can create painful cycles where you feel misunderstood, rejected, alone, and they feel blamed.
Over time, you might begin to avoid conflict altogether because it feels so dysregulating.
But, stuffing down your emotions only creates more internal pressure.
It can lead to resentment, anxiety, and distance in your relationship. The very thing you need—emotional closeness—feels harder and harder to reach when your nervous system is constantly on high alert.
That’s why working with a therapist like Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling is so important.
She specializes in helping highly sensitive individuals and couples understand their conflict patterns through the lens of nervous system regulation, trauma, and emotional safety.
In neurodivergent specialized marriage therapy, you’ll learn how to speak up for your needs, manage emotional flooding.
And, in couple therapy, Katie Ziskind teaches your partner how to approach you gently during hard moments.
You deserve a marriage where your sensitivity is understood, respected, and supported—not dismissed, or labeled as “too sensitive.”
Being highly sensitive isn’t a weakness.
It’s not “too much” or something you need to fix. Really, it’s simply how your brain and body are built. You might need more downtime than others to recover after social situations. Or, you may get overstimulated in bright, chaotic environments. You may cry easily—not because you’re fragile, but because your emotional experience runs deep. Being a highly sensitive person is a beautiful trait, and part of marriage counseling for neurodivergent couples.
As a highly sensitive person, you likely crave deep connection, not surface-level conversation.
You may get overwhelmed in arguments or shut down when your feelings aren’t understood.
This can be especially hard in relationships if your partner isn’t highly sensitive. You might feel “wrong” for needing more calm, more emotional safety, or more processing time.
If you’re a highly sensitive person, you crave deep emotional connection—the kind where you feel fully seen, heard, and understood. Marriage therapy for neurodivergent couples supports emotional bonding conversations.
Small talk feels shallow to you. You long for conversations that go below the surface—where you can talk about what’s in your heart, not just what’s on your to-do list. And, you want a marriage therapist who knows how to dive into deep emotional conversations and emotional intimacy. You get to talk about your childhood, inner child wounds, and how she shape both of you.
Surface-level connection just doesn’t satisfy your soul.
You want your partner to really get you—your moods, your energy, your fears, and your dreams. Couples therapy teaches your partner how to connect with you, step by step.
Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent couples, helps you both feel seen, heard, like you matter, and valued.
You likely feel the emotional energy in the room before anyone speaks.
From couples therapy, you can learn that as a highly sensitive person, you can sense when your partner is distant or stressed, even if they haven’t said a word. That’s because your nervous system is deeply attuned to emotional cues.
But when your partner brushes off your intuition or doesn’t want to go deeper, it feels like rejection.
You’re left wondering, Why won’t they open up to me? And, why do I always want more than they seem to give?
As a highly sensitive person, you might feel lonely even in your relationship if the emotional connection isn’t strong.
You want to feel bonded—not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually.
As well, you don’t want to have sex just to “check the box.” You want sex to feel like closeness, like presence, like tenderness and play. But when that emotional connection is missing, you may shut down, withdraw, or feel completely disconnected from your own desires.
Katie Ziskind, founder of Wisdom Within Counseling, understands the depth of your emotional world.
In couples therapy for neurodivergence, she creates a safe, soft space where you can explore your feelings.
You both get to express your needs, and help your partner understand the intensity of your inner experience.
Whether you’re feeling emotionally neglected, disconnected, or misunderstood, therapy helps you learn how to speak from your heart—and helps your partner learn how to truly meet you there.
To note, you don’t have to feel like you’re “too much” for wanting deep connection. You’re not needy or overly emotional.
Being highly sensitive is part of being neurodivergent. And, that sensitivity is a gift. It’s what makes you loving, intuitive, and emotionally wise.
If you’ve been craving a relationship where you can be fully yourself, fully known, and fully cherished, book a 90-minute video intake session. Together, in marriage therapy, you can begin building the emotional intimacy you deserve. Your partner can learn to be sensitive and gentle with you.
In neurodivergent specialized marriage therapy with Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching, your sensitivity is seen as a superpower, not a flaw.
Katie specializes in working with highly sensitive people and neurodivergent couples, helping you and your partner understand your differences in sensory processing, emotional intensity, and communication needs.
You deserve a relationship where your sensitivity is valued, not dismissed. Where your nervous system feels safe.
Where your need for gentleness, patience, and emotional intimacy is not just allowed—but honored.
If you’ve felt misunderstood, anxious, or shut down in your relationship, you’re not alone—and you’re not too sensitive.
You’re just highly tuned in. And, you deserve support from a therapist who specializes in neurodivergence and gets it. Book your 90-minute intake session now and begin learning how to thrive in love as a highly sensitive person.
If you’re in a relationship where you feel panic when your partner pulls away, you’re not alone—especially if you have an anxious attachment style and your spouse leans more avoidant.
This kind of dynamic is extremely common in neurodivergent couples. When you’re highly sensitive, have ADHD, or are on the autism spectrum, your nervous system is already wired to detect danger and respond quickly.
So, when your partner shuts down, avoids hard conversations, or needs space, it can feel terrifying to your body—like abandonment or rejection. Childhood was filled with abandonment and rejection.
That panic you feel? That racing heart, tight chest, or difficulty breathing?
Those are panic attacks triggered by attachment trauma, not weakness. Your body is reacting to a perceived threat to the connection, and for you, connection equals safety.
If you grew up in an environment where love felt inconsistent, where you had to earn attention or walk on eggshells, your nervous system learned that losing emotional closeness is dangerous—and your body remembers.
Meanwhile, your partner may pull away not to hurt you, but it still does hurt.
You don’t deserve the silent treatment. Couples therapy can help them verbalize that they feel overwhelmed, overstimulated, or flooded themselves.
If they’re neurodivergent with an avoidant attachment style, they may have learned to self-soothe by shutting down or withdrawing.
But, when they do that, it may feel to you like emotional abandonment. You chase, they retreat, and the pattern repeats—creating a painful cycle of disconnection.
Couples therapy specialized for neurodivergent relationships with Katie Ziskind can help you both understand what’s really happening underneath your reactions.
Katie Ziskind creates a space where you can learn to co-regulate. From couples therapy, you learn to calm your nervous systems together rather than turning away from each other.
You’ll learn how to express what you feel, in the moment, in a way your partner can hear—and how your partner can stay present, rather than shut down, even when the emotions feel big.
Over time, you and your spouse can build a secure attachment, one that doesn’t collapse when one of you needs space or when the other needs reassurance.
You’ll practice small, everyday rituals that build trust. Little things like texting back when you say you will, creating predictable connection time, and learning to name your needs without shame.
You’ll stop walking on eggshells and start feeling like you’re on the same team again.
Katie Ziskind brings trauma-informed, neurodivergence-affirming therapy that helps you unlearn these old patterns—not by blaming or pathologizing you, but by teaching you how to stay emotionally connected even when your bodies want to run in opposite directions.
She helps you slow down and recognize when a trauma response is hijacking your relationship—so you can respond with compassion instead of fear.
If you’ve been feeling like your emotions are “too much” or that you’re constantly chasing love, couples therapy will help you learn to feel safe, grounded, and chosen, no matter what your partner is going through.
You’ll learn how to manage your panic attacks, soothe your anxious thoughts, and ask for what you need without feeling ashamed or needy.
Your neurodivergent relationship deserves a therapist who understands the depth and complexity of your emotional world.
Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling specializes in helping couples just like you find peace, connection, and emotional balance. This is more than therapy—it’s the beginning of finally feeling safe in love.
Start building a secure, emotionally connected relationship—together.
Book your 90-minute video intake now for neurodivergent specialized marriage counseling.
What Are Signs of High Functioning Autism and Being on the Spectrum?
In many marriages, high-functioning autism can go unnoticed for years—especially when the partner on the spectrum is successful at work, high achieving, and dependable. You or your spouse might hold an impressive job, be a brilliant problem-solver, and bring structure and stability to your family life. On the surface, everything may look fine. But behind closed doors, emotional misattunement, miscommunication, and disconnection may be building—leaving one or both of you feeling lonely, rejected, or unloved.
One of the signs of high-functioning autism in a marriage is difficulty reading emotional cues.
You might notice that your partner seems distant or unresponsive when you express your feelings. They may not pick up on your tone of voice, body language, or facial expressions. You could be crying, withdrawing, or trying to flirt—and they simply miss it. This isn’t because they don’t care. It’s because their brain may not be wired to pick up on nonverbal cues in the same way.
Another sign of being on the autism spectrum is difficulty tracking emotions—both yours and their own.
Your spouse might ask, “Why are you upset?” after a tense interaction or say, “I don’t know what I’m feeling.” They may shut down during conflict or try to “solve the problem” without acknowledging your emotional experience. You might feel like you’re being emotionally abandoned in moments when you need closeness the most.
With Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, you can learn about flirting and to accept bids for connection.
Flirting, playfulness, and sexual initiation might also be missed with high functioning autism.
You may drop hints, change into something sexy, or cuddle up hoping for intimacy—but if your partner has high-functioning autism, they may not recognize these cues as sexual or romantic invitations.
You might feel rejected or unwanted, while your partner may feel confused or overwhelmed, wondering what they did wrong.
These patterns often create painful cycles of miscommunication and hurt, especially if one partner is highly sensitive or has an anxious attachment style. You may begin to assume your partner doesn’t care or doesn’t love you—when in reality, they may just be experiencing emotional and sensory overwhelm. Without the right support, this cycle can erode the couple bubble, leaving you both in a lonely, disconnected marriage.
This is where couples therapy with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, can be life-changing.
Katie Ziskind specializes in helping neurodivergent couples understand each other’s brains, nervous systems, and love languages. She provides a safe, nonjudgmental space to decode misunderstandings and start speaking the same emotional language. You’ll learn how to name your feelings, slow down in conflict, and build rituals of connection that actually work for both of you.
With Katie’s help, you’ll explore how attachment styles interact with neurodivergence. If one of you tends to avoid emotional closeness and the other clings tighter during stress, you’ll learn how these reactions were formed—and how to create safety together. You’ll learn how to regulate during conflict, offer emotional repair, and stop misinterpreting each other’s behaviors.
You’ll also work on rebuilding emotional and sexual intimacy in a way that honors sensory needs and neurodivergent experiences.
If your partner is touch-averse, easily overstimulated, or confused about how to initiate sex, Katie will guide you both in learning how to communicate openly and playfully—without shame. Sex becomes a co-created experience, not a source of anxiety.
Through marriage therapy, you’ll begin to build what’s called a secure attachment. This doesn’t mean you’ll be perfect. It means you’ll learn how to come back to each other after hard moments. You’ll feel safe expressing your emotions, knowing your partner can hold space for them. You’ll stop fearing abandonment or shutdowns—and instead, create consistent, predictable connection that you both can count on.
If you’ve been feeling like your marriage is stuck in emotional gridlock, but you deeply want to reconnect, don’t wait.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, Katie Ziskind offers 90-minute video intake sessions for neurodivergent couples who are ready to rebuild safety, emotional intimacy, and passion. Take your first step toward healing together with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships.
What Are Signs of High Functioning ADHD?
In many marriages, high-functioning ADHD often goes unrecognized because it doesn’t fit the stereotype.
If your spouse is incredibly productive at work, excels in a high-demand career, and appears well-organized, you may not realize they’re living with ADHD. But behind the scenes, you might feel like they’re never fully present with you.
They may work long hours and seem glued to their phone. Or, your spouse with ADHD struggles to slow down and connect—even during the most intimate moments.
One of the key signs of high-functioning ADHD in marriage is distraction—especially in emotionally or sexually intimate moments.
You might notice your partner drifting off mid-conversation or zoning out during sex. Maybe you try to share something vulnerable, and they check their phone or interrupt without realizing it. It can feel like they’re never fully with you, even when you’re in the same room. And over time, that lack of presence can hurt deeply.
Another common sign of high functioning ADHD that negatively impacts your marriage is workaholism as a coping strategy.
Many people with ADHD channel their nervous energy into structure, routine, and over-achievement at work, but that can leave you—their spouse—feeling like an afterthought. Their career might get their focus and attention, while you’re left navigating the emotional labor of your relationship alone. You might feel resentful, emotionally starved, or even invisible.
You may also notice that your partner with ADHD becomes easily overwhelmed by small changes or unexpected events.
Does your spouse with ADHD have a lot of trouble with changes in plans?
If dinner plans shift, the kids need something last minute, or you ask for emotional support in a stressful moment, they may get snappy, shut down, or seem emotionally unavailable.
What looks like coldness may actually be executive functioning overload—their brain struggling to adapt in real-time.
Rigidity is another subtle sign of high functioning ADHD that counseling with Katie Ziskind, marriage therapist specializing in neurodivergent relationships, offers expertise.
While ADHD is often associated with impulsivity and chaos, high-functioning ADHD can show up as inflexibility and a strong need for control. Your spouse might cling to strict routines, get irritated if things don’t go exactly as planned, or resist spontaneous moments of affection or connection. This can leave you feeling rejected or like you’re constantly “doing it wrong” in their eyes.
These patterns can create attachment injuries in your marriage—especially if you have an anxious or highly sensitive style.
You might feel like your needs are too much or that emotional connection is just out of reach. You may begin to question your worth or feel like you’re begging for affection and quality time. This dynamic can feel like a painful cycle you can’t break, even if both of you deeply love each other.
This is where couples therapy with Katie Ziskind comes in.
Katie Ziskind specializes in helping neurodivergent couples understand how their brains and bodies affect their ability to connect.
She creates a safe, compassionate space where you can finally feel seen and heard.
You’ll learn how ADHD shows up in your relationship. And, your ADHD is not a flaw, but as a pattern that can cause distance with out awareness. And, therapy with Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, helps you both learn how to repair conflicts and emotional rifts.
Katie Ziskind uses an attachment-based approach to help you and your partner build secure connection, even when one or both of you are wired differently.
You’ll learn how to co-regulate during emotional moments, how to express needs without triggering shutdowns, and how to communicate in ways that foster trust, not frustration. It’s not about blame—it’s about building understanding and connection.
Sexual intimacy often improves too, as you both learn how to slow down, become present, and honor sensory needs.
Does your spouse with ADHD rush to penis in vagina sex, or have unrealistic, or too high of expectations around sex? Wishing sex felt bonding?
Yes, your spouse with ADHD can absolutely have unrealistic expectations around sex—and you’re not alone if you’re feeling overwhelmed, pressured, or unseen because of it.
People with ADHD often crave high stimulation and novelty, which can create a desire for more frequent sex, more intensity, or quicker escalation.
This may leave you feeling like your own needs, especially for emotional closeness and slower foreplay, are being ignored.
And, that’s where therapy with Katie Ziskind, a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, can be incredibly healing.
When ADHD is involved, sex can sometimes become an outlet for restlessness, impulsivity, or even anxiety relief—rather than a shared emotional and physical connection.
You may notice your spouse quickly rushing toward penetration, bypassing your need for emotional intimacy, safety, and slow, sensual foreplay.
This can feel like performance pressure, objectification, or emotional abandonment in moments that are supposed to be intimate. It’s not that they don’t care—often, they simply don’t realize the importance of emotional and physical warm-up for your body.
Katie Ziskind works from a sex-positive, trauma-informed, female-centered lens in marriage counseling.
In couples therapy, she gently helps you and your spouse slow down, get curious, and understand each other’s sexual blueprints. If you’ve been feeling like sex is one-sided, or like you’re just a means to an orgasm rather than an erotic partner, Katie Ziskind helps reframe sex as a collaborative, connected experience where both of your needs are prioritized.
One of the things you’ll learn with Katie Ziskind, neurodivergent couples therapist, is how female pleasure requires time, safety, and emotional engagement.
You’ll talk openly about what your body needs—45 to 90 minutes of physical and emotional foreplay might not be optional for you. Katie creates a judgment-free space where these conversations can happen without shame, blame, or guilt.
You’ll explore how slowing down and savoring sex can actually enhance your partner’s ADHD brain—because it builds anticipation, excitement, and intimacy.
Katie Ziskind, neurodivergent couples therapist, also helps your ADHD spouse reframe their sexual expectations—moving away from instant gratification and toward emotional presence.
She offers education on how porn and cultural messages can warp ideas about female sexuality. Pornography is not accurate sexual health education. And, couples therapy helps you both re-learn how to connect with you in a way that’s not goal-oriented or ejaculation oriented, but deeply relational.
Sex becomes less about “getting to an outcome,” sexual performance and more about pleasure and bonding together.
Through working with Katie Ziskind, neurodivergent couples therapist, you and your partner will practice emotional attunement.
We never learn emotional attunement growing up. As well, you learn body-based connection, and co-regulation—essential skills for building safety and desire in a neurodiverse marriage.
You’ll also discuss how sensory sensitivities, anxiety, overstimulation, and ADHD impulsivity show up during sex—and how to adjust accordingly. Together, you’ll co-create a sexual dynamic that honors both of your neurotypes and nervous systems.
If you’ve been feeling like your sexual needs are invisible or minimized, or if sex has become something you dread or avoid, couples therapy with Katie Ziskind, neurodivergent couples therapist, can be the turning point.
You’ll no longer feel pressured to “just go along with it.” And, your spouse will learn how to meet you in your full emotional and erotic self. This isn’t about less sex—it’s about better, more connected sex.
Katie Ziskind, neurodivergent couples therapist, also supports conversations about sexual rejection, performance anxiety, and shame, helping you both create a space where no one feels like they’re “too much” or “not enough.” If you’ve felt emotionally starved or physically objectified, you’ll finally have a place to heal, speak up, and be truly understood.
Book your first 90-minute video intake session online. Katie Ziskind is a marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, ADHD, autism, and sensory processing disorder.
If your ADHD partner feels pressure or distraction during sex, therapy helps you co-create a safer, more playful sexual space.
Start building a more realistic, deeply connected, pleasure-oriented sex life that works for both of you. With Katie’s specialized guidance, you can turn confusion into clarity—and disconnection into desire.
Couples therapy helps you co-create a sex life where you both feel desired, present, and emotionally safe. Katie Ziskind also supports you in creating realistic rituals of connection that work with ADHD brains, not against them.
If your marriage has been marked by distraction, disconnection, or emotional distance, you don’t have to keep living in that cycle.
Book a 90-minute video intake session with Katie Ziskind. Start learning how to turn toward each other again with curiosity, compassion, and love.
A more secure, fulfilling relationship is possible—with the right support.
With Katie Ziskind, marriage counselor specializing in neurodivergent relationships, you get that expert support.
