Teen Therapy in Niantic, Connecticut
Ask Directly:
Ask your teen, “Are you thinking of suicide? Have you been self-harming?” Remember, talking directly and openly about suicide does not increase suicide risk. Even if they say, “I’m good.” Provide constant supervision. Do not leave your teen alone or drive a car alone. Continue to take threats/thoughts seriously. Follow through is important even after the child calms down and says, “I didn’t mean it.” A threat is a cry for help: “I am not coping and I need your help.”
Don’t Leave Your Loved One Alone
A person who is sducidal should not be left alone for the next 72 hours. If a person is a risk to themselves, a loved one or friend should drive them to the ER for a suicidal risk assessment.
Read Nonverbal Cues:
It can “talk” much louder than words. Your teen is really saying, “I need your love and attention because I’m in tremendous pain emotionally, and I can’t seem to stop it on my own. I need you to take care of me again.” Just because your teen may be distant/angry, they may also be feeling worried, grieving loss, shame, have experienced trauma, or another significant event they have been holding inside.
Support For Parents Helping A Teenager Who Has Been Suicidal Thrive Again
Create Rituals:
Before school or in the morning, make a nutritious breakfast for you both. Sit together for 30 minutes. Even if they don’t want to talk, holding the space as you eat together is a form of support and bonding. In time, this may be when your teen will look forward to talking with you. A positive relationship will open up communication between you and your teen. Likewise, create a routine for exercise, meals, and bedtimes.
Be Empathetic:
A great way to approach a frustrated teenager is to let them know you also share many of their feelings. When appropriate, to build trust, empathy, and authority in a fun way, share a short story from your life when you were their age. Avoid “fixing.” Being a teen can be tough. Reassure them that there is help and they will not feel like this forever. This shows your young adult that you believe in them and were once a teenager too.
Stay Positive and Healthy:
As a parent, it is important to schedule non-negotiable self-care such as a yoga class, morning run, a workout, book club, seeing your own therapist, or even a relaxing bath. Look at your week or your day and plan, so you don’t become exhausted and burnt out. Communicate with your partner or a friend to coordinate care for your other children, so you can dedicate self-care time and return refreshed to parenting your teen.
Handwritten Notes:
Write your young adult a note of compliments. Words of affirmations can be powerful. When you give your teen your note, go over all the things that are positive, valuable, and unique about your teen with him or her. Make it a habit to put a note in their lunch or gym bag. Even if you think they might be, “too old,” remember that they need your extra support, positive compliments, and encouragement during this time.
Regular Safety Checks:
Even if it seems intrusive, daily bedroom and full house safety checks are a must. Immediately and entirely remove the following dangerous items from your whole house: Razor blades, extra light bulbs, lighters, sharp objects, belts, extra shoelaces, medicine bottles, other family member’s medication, extra pills of any kind, even over-the-counter medicine, alcohol bottles (in the fridge and storage), household cleaners and chemicals, locking kitchen knives (checking for any missing knives daily). If your teen is on medication, provide them with the pill. Do a mouth check to make sure they have swallowed it. Use a lock box to hold the rest of the bottle until the next dose.
Understand Side Effects of Medication
SSRI’s and anti-depressants can lead to suicidal thoughts and suicidal thinking as side effects. Anti-depressants and SSRI’s can help with depression and anxiety, but can also have a side effect of suicidality. Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors [SSRIs] may cause worsening of suicidal ideas in young, adolescent patients.
Look At Your Teen’s Phone
Ask your cell phone company for a copy of text messages your teen has sent and received. They may text a friend that they want to die and feel hopeless about life verses telling a parent directly.
Regular Therapy:
Intensive, regular therapy sessions are very important to teach new coping skills and provide a safe place when your teen belongs, via providing outside, professional support. Teach your teen that therapy is not a punishment or something to be ashamed of, and discourage others from teasing your teen about going to therapy. Remind your teen, celebrities and movie stars have therapists too, so they can be the best they can be. In addition to regular mental health counseling, help your teen gain support from other professionals via weekly appointments: massage therapy, acupuncture, nutritionist, naturopath, art therapy, animal therapy, teen groups, personal fitness trainer, book clubs, ect.
Create a Plan:
Together with your teen, make a list of trusted family members or friends with phone numbers to call in a crisis. Connect these family members to let them know they are on this list and may receive a call. Encourage your teen to save the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) in their cell phone and call anytime.
Compiled by Katie Ziskind, LMFT, owner of Wisdom Within Counseling.
Call/text: (860) 451-9364.
If you need help parenting a suicidal teenager, we offer parent-only sessions, teen therapy, and family therapy.
