Often times, empty nest syndrome is what a mature adult experiences after they have accomplished parenting their children. With empty nest syndrome, an adult may feel a loss and a sense of grief.
It might feel like you don’t know what to do with your time now that your young adult children have moved out of your home.
Some empty-nesters have a period of tearfulness and sadness because it is a huge adjustment. You spent all this time, presence, energy, and attention helping your young children develop through their adolescent and teenager years. Now, they are successful, responsible adults and our of your home. Now, they are on their own and taking care of themselves. However, it can feel like there is a hole in your life that needs filling. In general, the sense of loss and grief can make an empty nester more prone to developing negative coping tools.
For example, anxiety, depression, social withdrawal, and alcoholism are common negative coping tools in empty-nesters.
Additionally, empty nest syndrome can occur in all genders, all ages of parents, and all ethnicities and nationalities. However, empty nest syndrome is more common in the parent who is the primary caretaker for the children.
Develop a new meaning to life
Furthermore, with empty nest syndrome, there is a change when it comes to the meaning of life. Right now, you may feel intense emotions like anger, loss, and abandonment. At one time, your young children gave your life meaning and gave you some thing to wake up for. However, having an empty nest syndrome means redefining your life‘s purpose in finding new purpose and things beyond child rearing. At first, this might seem unfamiliar, scary, awkward, anxious, loss, sadness, and you might even feel jealous of people who still have young children living with them at home. All of these feelings are normal to feel when it comes to developing empty nest syndrome. In this article, you will find tips and techniques to overcome empty nest syndrome.
Seek counseling for empty nest syndrome
Also, some adults benefit from counseling during this time which helps them deal with these feelings of loss and grief. If your children have grown up, it might feel like you have a missing piece in your heart. Essentially, working with a therapist can help you change your mindset from loss and grief. Instead of thinking about losing your children, you can think about gaining adult relationships with them and the fun of grandchildren.
Moreover, and make sure of individual counseling and couples counseling and support those suffering from empty nest syndrome.
Sometimes, a primary caretaker of children feels empty nest syndrome or severely and intensely than a parent who is the primary breadwinner.
Seek counseling for empty nest syndrome
Counseling for couples and individuals with empty nest syndrome is positive
A mix of individual and couples therapy can help with conflict that arises from sadness and stress due to empty nest syndrome. Empty nest syndrome can put stress on the marriage because conflicts and arguments are more frequent. When sadness, grief, and loss are present, one or both people have difficulties being romantic, feeling joyful, and sexual. As well, if a person is feeling depression as a result of empty nest syndrome, their romantic relationship and marriage may suffer. Individual and couples therapy can help partners with empty nest syndrome build strength, fall back in love, and create unity.
Couples therapy can help your spouse support you and understand feelings of rejection and sadness during this time.
Also, your couples therapist can help you team up to find a new sense of shared meaning in life together. Sometimes, a person with empty nest syndrome will a lien on their child emotionally.
Avoid putting anxiety, worry, pressure, or grief on your young adult who is moving out.
If you experience anxiety, grief, or abandonment, working with a therapist can help you process these emotions.
And, you can develop healthy and positive coping tools for when these emotions feel obsessive or persistent. Avoid confiding in your young adult when you are experiencing grief about their natural developmental stages of life.
When people with empty nest syndrome share too many emotions with their young adult child, the relationship becomes strained and distant. A young adult may develop guilt, when they need to be developing self-confidence and having healthy friendships. As well, working with a therapist came provide you with a healthy outlet for the range of emotions that may be present during empty nest syndrome.
Essentially, emptiness syndrome can last for a different amount of time for each person.
One person may have empty nest syndrome for three weeks and another person may have empty nest syndrome for a full year. Therefore, working with a therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling can offer you guidance, holistic coping strategies, and emotional confidence to overcome this challenge.
Try yoga or a new hobby
As well, you can find new hobbies and crafts to fill your time and feel fulfilled. You might consider selling your home and downsizing, or buying a second home for a travel location. Also, you can take time to be with yourself again. Maybe, you want to get into yoga and focus more on listening to your body. In general, getting into yoga and meditation can be great coping tools to help you through this major life transition. Yoga and meditation support an empty nester from developing depression from empty nest syndrome. Plus, going to a local yoga class or joining a yoga class virtually can help you make friends. Furthermore, you can make friends who are also going through the same thing as you are.
Focus on positives
Being an empty nester means there is no one asking you to pick up the crumbs or the garbage they left behind. You don’t have to be a taxi driver anymore to sport games. And, you don’t have to keep saving for their college. You can buy yourself a new outfit. Now, you are an empty nester and you can use this time to develop yourself. Also, you and your spouse can enjoy time together without the responsibilities of raising children. Sometimes, empty nesters will celebrate by buying a brand new white couch. In the past, when young children were running around, a white couch would be stained or peed on very quickly. Overall, see you this next chapter in your life as time to get in to self-care, do something just for you, and celebrate.
Treat then as an adult
In general, it is normal to experience anxiety and worry about your adult child‘s whereabouts. However, trust yourself that you did a good job raising them.
And, know they have everything they need to be emotionally ready for what the world offers.
The fact is, they are out of your house. And, if they need your support, they know they can come to you. Essentially, this is a shift into more of an adult like role with your adult child, rather than a parenting role. Yes, you will always be their parent. However, you might start relating and talking to them as more of an equal. For example, you may have been asking your child if their car has gas in it or if they did their homework. Now, you might offer more of a encouraging and listening ear. Essentially, allow your young adult to talk with you about their relationship challenges, their career goals, or what’s going on for them during your day. You no longer have to take responsibility for their success in the same way you did when they were living under your roof.
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Schedule time to talk
At first, it might be challenging to resist the urge to reach out to your children frequently. Essentially, it can help to ease some of this anxiety to create a schedule for when you talk. FaceTime or talk on the phone once a week on a Sunday night at 5 PM, when you both are free. This way, you don’t have anxiety because you’re young adult is not calling you back and you were worried about them. Have a planned time when you both are free, to help establish a more adult to adult relationship with your adult child.
Volunteer if you have empty nest syndrome
Empty-nesters may go through a variety of mental health challenges during this big life transition. Some empty-nesters develop depression, anxiety, and more severe challenges like alcoholism. Having more free time on your hands means that without direction, you might get bored easily. So, if you are a person that may develop depression or anxiety if you don’t have someone to caretake for take care of, volunteer. Volunteering is a great coping skill. For instance, you can volunteer at your local soup kitchen. Or, you can volunteer at your local Headstart preschool or volunteer at the hospital with premature babies. Overall, there are many ways to get out there, socializing, making new friends, and volunteering. Volunteering is a great way to get back to your community, laugh, and distract yourself while going through this big transition in life.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, the team of therapists love helping parents feel nurtured and supported through empty nest syndrome.
Even though you feel sad news, grief, and depression from empty nest syndrome, there is hope because you have young adult children now. Just because your children no longer live under your roof, doesn’t mean you can’t be in their lives. Working with a therapist can help you navigate the range of emotions is an empty nest syndrome while maintain a healthy relationship with your child. Also, you can learn how to spend time with them, talk with him on the phone, and support them in a more equal relationship. You can also gain positive coping tools for processing sadness, releasing stress, and building a more trusting bond with your spouse. There are many benefits to emptiness syndrome, but it can feel challenging when sadness is clouding your vision. Also, you can take part in getting new hobbies through art therapies, drama therapies, and outdoor walk and talk therapies. Wisdom Within Counseling offers you creative, expressive, holistic, meditation, art, walking, drama and yoga therapies.
Going for a walk by the Niantic Bay Boardwalk along the shoreline can be stress relieving.
Also, drama therapies, expressive arts, and Rehearsals For Growth allow you to role-play different scenarios and build confidence. Also, acting, improv, music, and outdoor therapies are all part of stress relief. Plus, painting, using modeling clay, games, drawing, glitter gel pens, and a variety of creative art therapies help you expressed emotions beyond words. The team of therapists that Wisdom Within Counseling and Coaching offer a holistic, creative, expressive arts and drama therapies to help you feel support in this time of your life. Remember, expressive art can allow you to unlock another part of yourself. And, drama, yoga and art can help you feel more confident and calm than ever before. Right now, your old identity and parent role is changing. In all that, therapy can help you feel strong and emotional validation. However, you are stepping into an exciting new chapter of your life. One of the therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling would love to help you build an amazing new chapter and over come empty nest syndrome.
