When you or your spouse, have a drinking problem, this can forever impact your marriage. When you first got married, you embarked on marriage with a variety of positive, and different expectations. You thought that you and your spouse wood could be creating something, beautiful, loving, and happy. Alcoholism can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder, painful experiences, sex issues, and anxiety in your marriage. Sometimes, you feel like you are walking on eggshells around her spouse. Other days, you have really good times and feel close and hopeful again. Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling gives you and safe place to process the intense feelings you have. You can talk about the anger, betrayal, and hurt, and also how to create more positive, good times together moving forward.
To begin, click below to book your phone consult for individual therapy, marriage therapy, and family therapy for positive coping tools when dealing with an alcoholic spouse.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling helps remove unrealistic expectations
For one, marriage is not what you see in the movies or on TV. And, marriage is not what you see posted on social media or on Facebook. But, you should never have to face emotional and verbal abuse from your alcoholic spouse. Marriage is one of the most rewarding and beautiful experiences you could ever have. As well, an alcoholic marriage can be one of the most painful and frustrating experiences, too.
Realizing that your spouse is a raging alcoholic and has anger issues can be incredibly scary and surreal.
When you have an alcoholic spouse, they may be lying to you about their drinking problem.
They may be hiding alcohol bottles around your house and you may find them when they are at work. Maybe, your alcoholic spouse has told you they have stopped drinking. However, they are keeping bottles of alcohol or cans of beer in their car or in the shed in your backyard. Dishonesty is a trait of an active alcoholic. When you try to talk with your spouse about their alcohol use, they get angry, irritable and upset.
It is very common to watch your alcoholic spouse want to cut down on alcohol, but be unable to.
Your alcoholic spouse spends a lot of time drinking alcohol, and they may spend a lot of time hung over. Even though you have something fun planned for a weekend morning, due to their hangover, they are unable to do that fun activity with your family. Additionally, when your spouse has alcoholism, when they don’t drink alcohol, they may also be angry and irritable.
When your spouse has severe alcoholism, they may struggle with regular hygiene, stay up all night, not even brush their teeth, and be using alcohol to cope with emotional pain.
Other traits of alcoholics in your spouse
In severe cases, when your spouse has alcoholism, they may be unemployed chronically. As a non-alcoholic spouse, you might have to be the breadwinner and financially stable for your entire family. It can be exhausting and emotionally draining to be in love and married to an alcoholic.
You might keep encouraging them to go to therapy, but they continue to overuse alcohol and say mean things when they are drunk. The next morning, your alcoholic spouse denies that they said those hurtful, mean things to you. They might even try to blame you for their alcoholic behaviors.
Functional alcoholism in a spouse
Additionally, alcoholics can be very functional. Alcoholics can have high earning jobs and stable careers. Also, alcoholics can also be considered functional alcoholics. This means that an alcoholic can hold a steady job, but after a day of work, he or she drinks alcohol. Then, an alcoholic may get into emotionally abusive arguments with their spouse.
Sometimes, both people struggle with alcoholism
Other times, in an alcoholic marriage, one or both people may also struggle with alcoholism.
When you have an alcoholic spouse, the person you thought you married is not the person that you are married to now.
Realizing your spouse is an alcoholic can be a process of grief and loss. You’ve ventured into marriage very hopeful and excited about a beautiful future together. Also, you had dreams of retiring together. Now, it feels like your spouse’s alcoholism is taking over all the parts of who they are. It’s hard to see them in a positive light, when they forget the mean and hurtful things they said to you when they were drunk. Gaining acceptance skills can be a part of alcoholic marriage therapy.
Learn to reduce the cycle of negative communication in counseling for your spouse’s alcoholism
As well, and a spouse of an alcoholic, who doesn’t have alcoholism themselves, may get pulled into the cycle of arguing. Couple therapy can help a non-alcoholic spouse stay calm. Instead of arguing back or escalating an argument with a drunk person, couples therapy can teach positive communication strategies.
Both of you may need to learn healthy ways to communicate what you need. Setting boundaries can also be a beautiful skill that couples therapy can teach you.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Wisdom Within Counseling teaches couples positive communication skills and empathy skills.
In couples therapy, you can create a more trustworthy, passionate and meaningful marriage.
Alcoholism is a disease where one or both people struggle with stopping drinking once they begin. When you or your spouse, begin drinking alcohol, you might find it difficult to only have one drink. Also, when you and your spouse begin drinking together, it might feel like you are twin flames. You both have a good time drinking together.
When you drink alcohol, you and your spouse, encourage each other to have another drink. Before you know it, things don’t feel good. It’s hard to figure out where the good times of this cycle end, and the painfulness begins.
Working with an alcoholic marriage therapy specialist in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can truly help.
In an alcoholic marriage, you or your spouse may need help getting sober. Or, you or your spouse may have recently gotten sober, which is now changing the dynamic of your marriage. Importantly, even when you or your spouse decide to get sober, negative communication tactics, and negative communication skills may still be present.
Just because there is no more drinking and one or both of you are sober from alcohol now, you may still be using unhealthy communication tactics.
For instance, getting sober is a great first step in bettering your marriage. However, you and your spouse may still be raising your voices, yelling at each other, name-calling, or interrupting when the other person is speaking. As well, the alcohol has provided a sense of numbing over the last few decades.
Individual counseling and marriage therapy can help when you suffer from emotional and verbal abuse due to living with an alcoholic spouse.
There can be negative mental health effects of living with an alcoholic spouse. Even if your alcoholic spouse does not physically hit you, the effects of emotional abuse can be just as damaging as domestic violence. When your alcoholic spouse is drunk, they may cause you emotional harm. As well, individual and couples therapy can help you communicate your boundaries with your alcoholic spouse.
To note, victims of emotional and verbal abuse often suffer from low self-esteem, high levels of anxiety, and emotional instability. As well, you may suffer from worry, trouble sleeping, appetite changes, social withdrawal, embarrassment, humiliation, and self blame. The verbal and emotional abuse at the hands of your alcoholic spouse is never your fault. It is okay if you feel frustrated, have anxiety, or confused about this situation you are in.
If you are dealing with any of these emotional impacts of having an emotional abusive, alcoholic spouse, the team at Wisdom Within Counseling can help.
When your alcoholic spouse is displacing frustration and anger on your children, you may feel afraid.
Additionally, if you tell your alcoholic spouse that you want to separate or get divorced, they may threaten suicide. Working with a Wisdom Within Counseling therapist to understand the effects of living with an alcoholic can help you pay attention to your own mental health and set boundaries.
Maybe, one of the boundaries that you set from working with an alcohol specialist at Wisdom Within Counseling is calling 911. You do not have to deal with extreme emotional violence or domestic violence at the hands of an alcoholic spouse alone. If at any time it feels like your alcoholic, emotionally abusive spouse will not calm down, and is endangering you or your children, it is okay to call 911. As well, if your alcoholic spouse is threatening suicide, call 911 to get them to help they need.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
In alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for alcoholism, you and your spouse can talk about how alcohol has affected you both.
Being in an alcoholic marriage means that you both need to learn healthier communication skills.
When you name call, slam doors, belittle each other, or use condescending tone’s voices, you might not even be realizing you are doing so. Many times, fighting, distant couples do not realize the negative communication tactics they are currently using are harmful.
Notably, negative communication leads one another to feel belittled, unappreciated, or even resentful. Alcoholic marriage counseling can help you and your spouse learn about emotional communication instead of using negative communication.
How can alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling help us improve our communication?
Emotional communication means using, “I feel” statements and taking ownership for your emotions.
Rather than belittling, your partner, criticizing them, or telling them about what they should change about themselves, “I feel“ statements allow for ownership.
In an alcoholic marriage, it is very easy for both partners to point the finger at the other person. Especially, this is very common in newly sober relationships, and marriages.
When your spouse, or you are newly sober from alcohol, it might be really easy to point the finger at your spouse and tell them what they should be doing differently, or how they should be behaving differently.
Instead, your Wisdom Within Counseling couples therapist can help pinpoint the behavior changes. You and your spouse can learn how building empathy skills will be more beneficial than telling your partner what they should change about themselves.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you take the step you need after getting sober from alcohol to truly better your marriage. So, by learning healthier communication skills, you can build meaningful connection and a trusting bond.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut for positive communication skills and positive coping strategies.
Traits of an alcoholic spouse
Each spouse with alcoholism may exhibit different traits and behaviors. When dealing with alcoholism in your spouse, it is not your fault. Your alcoholic spouse may have some of the following traits.
Excessive or Compulsive Drinking:
One of the most prominent traits of an alcoholic spouse is the persistent and uncontrollable consumption of alcohol. They may engage in heavy drinking, frequently exceeding moderate and safe levels.
Preoccupation with Alcohol:
An alcoholic spouse may display an intense preoccupation with alcohol, constantly thinking about when and where they can obtain their next drink or planning their activities around drinking.
Increased Tolerance:
Over time, an alcoholic spouse may develop a higher tolerance for alcohol, requiring larger quantities to achieve the desired effect. This can contribute to a cycle of increased consumption.
Withdrawal Symptoms:
When an alcoholic spouse attempts to cut down or stop drinking, they may experience withdrawal symptoms such as irritability, anxiety, tremors, insomnia, sweating, or nausea. These symptoms may drive them to continue drinking to avoid the discomfort.
Neglect of Responsibilities:
Alcoholism can cause an individual to neglect their responsibilities, including work, household chores, or childcare. They may struggle to fulfill their obligations due to the effects of alcohol or prioritize drinking over their responsibilities.
Mood Swings and Irritability:
Alcohol abuse can lead to emotional instability, causing an alcoholic spouse to exhibit frequent mood swings, irritability, or unexplained outbursts of anger. These emotional shifts can strain relationships and create a tense environment at home.
Secrecy and Hiding Behavior:
An alcoholic spouse may go to great lengths to hide their drinking habits. They may stash alcohol in hidden places, lie about their consumption, or isolate themselves to drink in secret.
Financial Problems:
Alcoholism can lead to financial difficulties, as an alcoholic spouse may prioritize purchasing alcohol over meeting financial obligations. They may engage in impulsive spending or borrow money to support their addiction.
Health Issues:
Prolonged alcohol abuse can result in a range of physical and mental health problems. An alcoholic spouse may experience frequent illnesses, blackouts, memory loss, or signs of deteriorating physical and cognitive functioning.
Relationship Struggles:
Alcoholism often causes strain within marriages and relationships. An alcoholic spouse may become distant, emotionally unavailable, or engage in behaviors that erode trust and intimacy. Conflict and communication breakdowns are common.
It is important to approach alcoholism with empathy and understanding, with the help of a therapist. At Wisdom Within Counseling, our team of therapists help by recognizing that alcoholism is a complex issue.
If you spouse is suffering from alcoholism, seeking professional guidance can provide valuable assistance. Loving someone, especially your spouse, with alcoholism, can be very emotionally taxing.
Talk about your narcissistic, alcoholic parents, and complex childhood trauma in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling
Often times, when you are in an alcoholic marriage, or in a marriage with an alcoholic, even if they are sober, you may have both grown up with alcoholic parents. You may identify as an adult child of alcoholic parents.
Your spouse may identify as an adult child of alcoholic parents too.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
What does it mean to be an adult child of alcoholics?
Well, when you are an adult child of alcoholics, or your spouse as an adult child of alcoholics, you both experienced childhood trauma. Growing up, your parents, emotionally neglected, you, were narcissistic, and did not care for your emotional needs.
When your parents suffered from alcoholism themselves, they may have emotionally neglected you, put themselves first, or made you act like a parent, when your role was to be a child.
In your childhood, growing up with alcoholic parents, you may have walked on eggshells, face, verbal abuse, or even sexual abuse.
As a child, you were forced to be responsible for the emotions of your parents, and as a result, you put your needs on the back burner.
In your childhood, growing up with parents, who were alcoholics, you were forced to be a perfectionist in the caretaker.
Adult children of alcoholics often have low self-esteem because alcoholic parents never give praise. It may have felt like your parents were always making you feel like you were never going to be good enough. Also, adult children of alcoholics often have low, self-worth and confidence issues. You and your spouse might suffer from insecurities, self consciousness, or even body image issues as a result of having parents who are alcoholics.
As an adult child of alcoholics, you may have developed a normalization for alcohol use. Growing up, you saw your parents get drunk, treat each other in violent ways, use unhealthy communication tactics, and treat you in harmful ways.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Navigating the Impact of Adult Children of Alcoholics on Married Life
Couples Therapy Can Help Partners In Understanding the Link to Alcoholism and Relational Stress
When a spouse is an adult child of alcoholics (ACOA), their past experiences and upbringing can significantly influence their relationship dynamics and individual struggles. Growing up in an environment marked by alcoholism can lead to various challenges, including an increased risk of developing alcoholism themselves. In couples therapy, explore how being an adult child of alcoholics can contribute to alcoholism problems within a marriage.
When your spouse is an adult child of alcoholics, this leads to marital stress and tension. Understanding these dynamics is crucial in fostering empathy, seeking support, and finding avenues for healing within the relationship.
The Cycle of Familial Alcoholism:
Children who grow up in households affected by alcoholism often witness firsthand the destructive behaviors associated with addiction. The traumatic experiences, inconsistency, and emotional turmoil within their family unit can leave a lasting impact. As adults, adult child of alcoholics may unconsciously replicate patterns of behavior they observed during childhood, including turning to alcohol as a coping mechanism.
Coping Mechanisms and Self-Medicating:
Also, adult child of alcoholics may struggle with unresolved emotional pain, low self-esteem, anxiety, or depression resulting from their upbringing. These individuals may turn to alcohol as a means of self-medication, seeking temporary relief from emotional distress or a way to numb their pain. Unfortunately, this can lead to a cycle of dependence and addiction that affects both the adult child of alcoholics and their marriage.
Relational Dynamics and Triggers:
Marriages where one spouse is an adult child of alcoholics can experience unique challenges. The presence of alcoholism can trigger memories, emotional responses, and relational dynamics rooted in the adult child of alcoholics’s upbringing. These triggers can result in communication breakdowns, conflict, and tension within the relationship. The non-adult child of alcoholics spouse may struggle to understand the underlying reasons for their partner’s behavior, leading to further strain in the marriage.
Codependency and Enabling:
To note, adult child of alcoholics may develop codependent tendencies, placing their partner’s needs above their own and enabling their addictive behaviors. The non-adult child of alcoholics spouse may unknowingly fall into a role where they enable the adult child of alcoholics’s alcoholism, whether by covering up their actions, making excuses, or shouldering responsibilities that rightfully belong to their partner. This codependent dynamic can perpetuate the cycle of addiction and contribute to marital stress.
Trust Issues and Emotional Intimacy:
Trust is a crucial component of a healthy marriage, but the presence of alcoholism can erode trust within the relationship. The non-adult child of alcoholics spouse may struggle with doubts, anxiety, and fear of their partner’s actions and relapses. The adult child of alcoholics spouse, burdened by shame and guilt, may find it challenging to open up and be vulnerable, hindering emotional intimacy within the marriage.
Seeking Support and Healing:
While navigating the challenges of alcoholism within a marriage can be daunting, there is hope for healing and strengthening the relationship. Here are some steps to consider:
Encourage Individual Therapy
Both spouses may benefit from individual therapy to address their unique challenges and gain a deeper understanding of how their past experiences impact their current dynamics.
Attend Couples Therapy For Alcoholism, Such As At Wisdom Within Counseling
Couples therapy can provide a safe space for open communication, rebuilding trust, and developing healthy coping strategies. A skilled therapist can help the couple navigate the complexities of alcoholism and its impact on their relationship.
Join Support Groups For Adult Children of Alcoholics
Engaging in support groups specifically designed for ACOAs and spouses of alcoholics can offer a sense of community, empathy, and valuable guidance from individuals who have shared similar experiences.
Practice Self-Care
Both spouses should prioritize self-care to maintain their own well-being and emotional resilience. This may include engaging in activities that promote relaxation, setting boundaries, and emotional calming tools.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, we help spouse of adult child of alcoholics, and adult child of alcoholics themselves, break negative patterns. You and your alcoholic spouse get a safe, confidential space to create a calm, stable home environment in marriage therapy.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you create a happier, healthier, more positive relationship
Overtime, being an adult child of alcoholics, these behaviors have become part of your own marriage. Breaking the pattern of generational, trauma and generational verbal abuse are parts of Wisdom Within Counseling couples therapy.
You can learn about these generational patterns, and talk about your own upbringing, and the parts of your upbringing that you do not want to have as a part of your family now.
Also, you may have experienced very painful, emotional experiences due to having alcoholic parents and identifying as an adult child of alcoholics.
Right now, in your marriage, you are suffering, and you want to create a better future with your spouse.
Deep down, you love your spouse, and you got together for very wholesome reasons. However, things are feeling very lonely, distant, and you wonder if there is any hope for a future with your spouse.
Working with a team of alcoholic marriage therapists and couples therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling can give you a sense of hope again. After you and your spouse, talk in counseling about your childhood trauma, and being an adult child of alcoholics, you can gain a sense of compassion for each other.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
In couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling for alcoholism, you and your spouse can take the next step after getting sober, to treat each other in more loving, affectionate, and intimate ways.
Often times, adult children of alcoholics struggle with trust issues from childhood which lead to sexual intimacy issues in the bedroom.
Due to child abuse, molestation, or exposure to sexual acts at a young age due to having a parent, who is an alcoholic, you may have sex and intimacy issues in your marriage now.
Sexual abuse is traumatizing and leaves a lasting impact.
What is sexual abuse?
Sexual abuse could be getting touched. In an unwanted way. When your body boundaries are not respected, and someone touches your body, this is a form of sexual abuse.
Non-contact sexual views can also include be exposed to someone having sex, or be exposed to someone masturbating without your consent.
Maybe an older adult exposed their naked genitals to you when you were just a child.
Or, an older child touched your body in a way that was inappropriate while babysitting you.
At the time, molestation, incest, and unwanted touch, with something you kept silent and hidden as a secret.
As an adult, couples therapy can help you talk with your spouse about how these sexual trauma and sexual abuse experiences have affected your sex life in your marriage.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Talk about sex and intimacy issues in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling
When your spouse asks for sex, it feels like you are constantly in a position of turning your spouse down or avoiding sex. Maybe, you don’t want to give oral sex or you find yourself disgusted when your spouse asks for oral sex.
Anxiety and fear around sexual acts is often a sign of a larger experience of sexual trauma or sexual shame and guilt.
Sexual trauma is different for each person, sexual trauma can also come from a parent. Perhaps your parent was supposed to keep you safe and make you feel comfortable growing up. But, due to their alcoholism, they violated and sexually abused your body in someway.
Instead of keeping you safe, your alcoholic parent was sexually abusive to you for many years.
As a result, you may have distance yourself from your alcoholic parents to keep yourself and your children safe now in your adult years.
In general, your spouse could benefit from better understanding how your experiences of sexual trauma and molestation impact your current sex life now and your marriage.
Couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling is a safe place that to talk about sexual trauma and the current sexual issues in your marriage.
When your spouse initiates sex, you can help them have compassion for you to better understand that you are saying “no” out of fear, anxiety, trauma, guilt. Sexual trauma in childhood leads to fear of sex and anxiety in adulthood. Talking about these associations with your own sexual trauma history is positive in marriage counseling.
You might find yourself anxious, having a panic attack, or frustrated, or even angry when your spouse asks you for sex.
Marriage therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling can be an incredible experience for both partners to talk about the meaning, and the associations they have behind sex and intimacy.
Sex means something different to you because of your sexual trauma history and because you had alcoholic parents. And, sex means something different to your spouse. Be able to talk about the meaning of sex can be very healthy in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling.
In marriage counseling, your spouse can talk about how sex might mean something different to them. For instance, because your spouse did not experience, sexual trauma, sex might mean love, or it might mean that they are attractive still.
When you reject your spouse sexually, they might feel like they are unattractive, or they are unlovable. And, being able to hear your spouse, talk about what sex intimacy means to them can help you gain a better understanding and eventually see them as a safe person, who wants to be loved.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Overcome sexual shame and guilt from cultural standards, religion, and your upbringing
There could also be a lot of shame and guilt from our culture regarding sex and intimacy that leads to frustration and fighting for couples. For instance, you and your spouse may not have had proper sexual education growing up.
Growing up, you may have internalized shame, guilt, and anxiety due to lack of proper sexual health education. Even when you have parents that don’t talk about sex, you can still carry shame, and guilt that affects your sex life in your marriage.
You may, or your spouse may have grown up in an environment or culture where sex was taboo. Not receiving any sexual education can lead to shame, guilt, and anxiety around sexual activities. The shame, guilt, anxiety can be very helpful to talk about in the presence of a couples therapist who specializes in sex and intimacy, as well as alcoholism.
Learn to have a great sex life sober in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling
Maybe, now that you’ve gotten sober, it feels awkward to have sex. You can talk about the feelings of awkwardness or anxiety around sex and intimacy with your marriage therapist.
Whereas, before, you just drank a lot of alcohol and that made you feel comfortable to have sex. Having sex, sober and participating in intimate activities together can be a whole new experience now that you’ve stopped drinking alcohol.
Your marriage therapist can help you both talk about the changes of what it feels like to have sex, and be intimate, sober without alcohol, rather than having sex drunk.
What is post-traumatic stress disorder?
When alcohol has been a huge part of your childhood and your marriage, it’s normal to have post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms. Post-traumatic stress disorder is a symptom and diagnoses that many adult children of alcoholics suffer from.
You might walk on eggshells, suffer from panic attacks, have mood swings, suffer from irritability, and even appetite changes. In a split second, now, with PTSD, your mood might go from calm and joyful to tense and anxious.
Talking about your symptoms of PTSD can help your spouse understand what you are going through emotionally. So often, distant, fighting couples just keep these emotions to themselves and stuff them away.
You and your spouse may have learned to stuff your emotions away due to having alcoholic parents and being adult children of alcoholics.
Growing up with adult parents who did not care for your emotional needs, you learn to not show your feelings. And, having parents who are alcoholics, you learned that the only thing you could show is happiness.
You couldn’t cry, or you may have been physically abused. Maybe, your parents would humiliate you or make fun of you if you showed any sign of weakness.
Now, and marriage therapy for alcoholism, you can learn how to process symptoms of trauma, and truly show your feelings.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Expressing your emotions can build empathy, compassion, and greater understanding in your marriage, making your marriage a much safer experience.
As well, marriage counseling for alcoholism can help you and your spouse develop a stronger sense of empathy and meaningful connection after childhood trauma. You and your spouse might both suffer from symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder, and needs self-care and self-regulation tools.
Learn about self-care skills in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling and how they support a healthy marriage
Self-regulation tools are a form of self soothing, and self-care. Adult children of alcoholics often do not learn self-care skills or the value of emotional regulation, skills in childhood. When you have abusive, narcissistic and alcoholic parents, your parents don’t teach you empathy or self-care.
Growing up, you may have seen your parents modeled explosive anger, violent fights, and power and fear-based tactics versus positive coping skills or calm coping strategies.
Couples therapy may be the first time in your life where you get to learn positive coping strategies and and how important self-care is. Sometimes, adult children of alcoholics suffer from guilt when practicing self-care for the first time.
Growing up, your narcissistic, alcoholic parents may have told you that you had to be the caretaker for them and your siblings. So, now you are learning that it is okay and positive to take care of yourself first and foremost. Setting boundaries is a a form of self-care.
Each person in a healthy marriage needs to have adequate and regular self-care routines to promote a calm inner landscape.
If you are bringing a chaotic mind and disorganized mind to your marriage, your marriage will be much more hostile and anxious.
However, after practicing self-care skills and self soothing techniques, you can bring a much more calm and grounded version of yourself to your marriage. This way, you and your spouse can have more calm, effective communication, tools, to better handle, triggering subjects in your marriage.
Self-care, tools and self-regulation strategies can include mindfulness, meditation, yoga, going for a walk every day, regular, nutritious meals, and drinking water regularly.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you both talk about shared self-care routines such as going to bed at a reasonable hour together.
Brushing your teeth twice a day, and getting good sleep are both important, and you may be able to do these parts of self-care together. Even things like going grocery shopping together and picking out fruits and vegetables can be a meaningful activity that couples therapy can encourage you to do.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
Why work with a somatic therapist, who teaches holistic lifestyle changes in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling?
It’s important to know that some psychiatric medications can help post traumatic stress disorder, but developing holistic lifestyle changes and mind-body skills will be much more effective long-term.
Sometimes, after suffering from alcoholism for years, and getting sober, you and your spouse may develop other addictive behaviors.
You might develop a pornography addiction after getting sober from alcohol. Or, you might develop an addiction to psychiatric pills or anxiety medication after getting sober from alcohol.
You might develop an addiction to ADHD medication. Sometimes, people develop an addiction to affair, behaviors or infidelity.
Angry fights can become addictive. You and yourYou and your spouse, who are newly sober from alcohol, maybe stuck criticizing each other, name-calling, pointing fingers at each other, belittling each other, and telling each other what the other should improve.
As well, people who are newly sober from alcohol may develop an addiction to food, develop disordered, eating behaviors, a binge and purge cycle, or an addiction to junk food.
Understanding how trauma affects addiction and alcoholism can be very helpful in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling.
Dealing with the trauma memories and processing these trauma memories using mind-body, somatic therapies can be very effective. Being able to process trauma memories in the holistic space can help you and your spouse develop lifelong self-regulation strategies and positive coping tools.
You don’t have to turn to medication, anger, junk food, drugs, pornography, or another substances to numb out in the same way that you used to use alcohol.
Learn to break the high conflict fight cycle in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling
More so, it is very common for couples to turn to anger and negative communication as a way of coping after getting sober. Anger can also be addictive to some degree.
Couples who have experienced childhood trauma from alcoholic parents get stuck in high conflict, fight cycles that lead to more hurt feelings, and perpetuate the pain.
Being able to learn healthy, communication skills, and talk about past trauma experiences in couples therapy can be a helpful and effective. You can learn additional ways to break the cycle of high conflict fighting in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling.
Wisdom Within Counseling specializes with alcoholism, sex, intimacy, complex trauma, and helps couples develop meaningful connection
If you feel hopeless about the future of your marriage and want the help of a professional, who understands topics like complex trauma, adult children of alcoholics, addiction, and sex intimacy issues, you are in the right place.
Our marriage therapists are Gottman level two trained. As well, our marriage, therapists understand the complexities of childhood trauma, sexual abuse, alcoholism, and how sex and intimacy issues in your current marriage play a role all together.
To begin, click below to book a phone consult for alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling for positive communication skills and deep connection moving forward.
The marriage therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling specialize with distant couples who get stuck in a high conflict cycle, struggle with alcoholism, belittlement, criticism, negative communication, and who want to break a trauma bond.
Your marriage therapist will pause you when communication becomes unhealthy. As well, your couple therapist will teach you how to communicate what you are trying to say in a more effective and healthy manner right in your therapy session.
Working with our couples therapists can help you have a second chance in creating an even healthier marriage than you have ever had before.
If you grew up with alcoholic parents who were narcissistic and emotionally abusive, you didn’t learn these empathy skills growing up. Your parents failed to teach you that you were important, and you deserve love and respect.
Working with an alcoholic marriage and complex trauma specialist, who understands the impact of narcissistic parents, current marital issues, sex and intimacy issues, and can help you learn healthy communication skills, will be very helpful in improving your marriage.
Our team and Wisdom Within counseling specializes in complex, childhood trauma, high conflict, fight cycles, helping couples build, meaningful connection, and trust again.
If you find that you and your spouse are name-calling, feeling belittled, want to talk about sex and intimacy, alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can help.
Wisdom Within Counseling can help you have a better marriage. You are in the right place to build a happier, healthier, more positive connection with your spouse after trauma.
The team at Wisdom Within Counseling, specializes with distant couples, who want to work together after alcoholism and trauma, feel a sense of playfulness again.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you also rebuild sexual desire and intimacy.
We offer emotional coping strategies, intimacy, skills, and a safe and confidential place to improve your marriage.
When you go to alcoholism couples therapy, you can make shifts and improve other relationships outside of your marriage as well.
Where in Fairfield County, Connecticut is couples therapy for alcoholism available?
Wisdom Within Counseling specializes with couples needing help after alcoholism, complex childhood trauma, and help rebuilding their sex life in Bridgeport, Stamford, Norwalk, Danbury, Cos Cob, Fairfield, Greenwich, Stratford, Shelton, Trumbull, Sandy Hook, Sherman, Redding Center, Redding Ridge, Riverside, Woodbridge, Old Greenwich, Georgetown, Easton, Westport, Ridgefield, Darien, New Canaan, Wilton, Newtown, Bethel, Monroe, Brookfield, Redding, Weston, Connecticut.
Our alcoholism marriage therapy specialists also help in couples counseling in the following Connecticut towns, East Lyme, Groton, Mystic, Stonington, West Simsbury, West Hartford, Glastonbury, Avon, Farmington New Haven, Simsbury, Newington, Southington, Ledyard, Middlebury, Old Lyme, Lyme, Clinton, Madison, Middletown, Granby, Guilford, Darien, Cheshire. Brookfield. Southbury, Milford, Monroe, Coventry, Berlin, Canton, Rocky Hill, and Wallingford, Connecticut.
The Wisdom Within Counseling couples therapists and intimacy counselors are also licensed to offer marriage therapy for alcoholism in Florida, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansa, Louisiana, Tennessee, North Carolina, Kentucky, Virginia, West Virginia, Ohio, Maryland, Delaware, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Utah, New Hampshire, and Maine.
To begin, book your phone consult below for couples therapy to deal with the effects of having an alcoholic spouse.
Navigating the Effects of Having an Alcoholic Spouse In Counseling
Living with an alcoholic spouse can be an emotionally and mentally challenging experience. The effects of alcoholism not only impact the individual struggling with addiction but also have a profound influence on their partner and the dynamics of their relationship.
Understanding these effects is crucial in finding ways to cope, support, and ultimately seek help for both the individual and the relationship as a whole.
You may be suffering from common effects of having an alcoholic spouse and discuss the importance of seeking support in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling.
We can help you finding a path towards healing.
Emotional Rollercoaster:
Living with an alcoholic spouse often leads to emotional turmoil. The unpredictability of their behavior, mood swings, and broken promises can cause immense stress and anxiety. As a spouse, you may experience a range of emotions, including anger, sadness, frustration, and guilt.
The constant worry for your partner’s well-being and the strain of dealing with the consequences of alcohol abuse can take a toll on their mental and emotional health.
Communication Breakdown:
Alcoholism can significantly impact communication within a relationship. As the addiction progresses, the spouse struggling with alcohol may become defensive, evasive, or dishonest about their drinking. Open and honest communication becomes increasingly challenging, leading to a breakdown in trust and emotional intimacy. The non-alcoholic spouse may struggle to express their concerns or set boundaries, further exacerbating feelings of isolation and frustration.
Codependency and Enabling:
Living with an alcoholic spouse often gives rise to codependent behaviors, where the non-alcoholic partner enables and protects the addicted partner from the consequences of their actions.
Codependency can manifest in various ways, such as making excuses for their behavior, covering up for their drinking, or shouldering responsibilities that rightfully belong to the alcoholic spouse.
Over time, this dynamic can perpetuate the cycle of addiction and hinder both partners’ personal growth and well-being.
Neglected Needs and Self-Care:
The needs and self-care of the non-alcoholic spouse are often overshadowed by the demands of the addiction.
They may neglect their own well-being, focusing solely on their partner’s struggles. This self-neglect can lead to physical and emotional exhaustion, a decline in their own mental health, and a sense of lost identity.
Prioritizing self-care and seeking support in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling becomes essential for the non-alcoholic spouse.
Other self-care skills help to maintain your own well-being and navigate the challenges you face.
Impact on Children and Family Life:
Having an alcoholic spouse can have a profound effect on children and family dynamics.
Children may witness conflict, emotional distress, and instability within the household, which can result in long-lasting emotional and psychological consequences. As the non-alcoholic spouse, you may assume additional parenting responsibilities, leading to feelings of overwhelm and an imbalanced family dynamic.
Seeking support for the entire family is crucial in mitigating the impact of addiction and promoting a healthier environment for children. Wisdom Within Counseling also offers family therapy.
Seeking Support At Wisdom Within Counseling When You Have An Alcoholic Spouse
Living with an alcoholic spouse is not an easy journey, but there is hope for healing and recovery through individual therapy, couples therapy, and family therapy.
Wisdom Within Counseling can teach you about alcoholism and healthy boundary skills
Learn about alcoholism, its effects, and the resources available for support. Engage the assistance of therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling, counselors, or support groups specializing in addiction and codependency. If you haven’t already, go to Al-Anon, which offers support to non-alcoholics who love an alcoholic. You can get the help of a sponsor who can relate to what you are going through.
Learn about boundaries in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling. Establish clear boundaries to protect your own well-being and communicate them effectively to your spouse.
Taking part in your own relaxation strategies like yoga and meditation can be very helpful when you have an alcoholic spouse.
You might be walking on eggshells around your alcoholic spouse. Sometimes, they are in a great mood. Other times, they are drunk and in a crazy state of mind. Do not engage in arguing with them when they are drunk. Staying calm will allow you to keep the peace in your home, without getting riled up yourself. Meditation and deep breathing practices can help you during these tense moments.
Socialize and do things for yourself when your spouse has alcoholism
It is very common for victims of complex post traumatic stress disorder and non-alcoholic spouses to self isolate. Do not withdraw during this time of stress and tension. Talk to your family and friends about what is going on in your marriage. Don’t feel like you have to keep your spouse’s alcoholism or domestic violence a secret any longer. Connect with friends, family, or support groups who understand the challenges you face and can offer guidance and empathy.
Encourage your spouse to seek professional help such as with the team at Wisdom Within Counseling for their alcohol addiction. Consider attending individual therapy, couples therapy, or family therapy together.
Take time to focus on your own self-care in alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling
Do not let verbal abuse or emotional abuse from your spouse bring you down. Go to a local yoga class, drink water, and make sure to go to bed on time. Eat nourishing and nutritious meals.
Don’t let negativity from your alcoholic spouse suck the life out of you any longer. Working with a therapist who understands what it is like to be in a marriage with an alcoholic can help you make a list of healthy self-care activities to do every day.
Alcoholic marriage therapy in Greenwich, Connecticut at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you slow down your intense emotions and release them
You may feel torn about whether you want to separate or stay in your marriage. Emotions may feel intense, and complex. Many times, this is not an easy or an overnight decision. Talking with a professional who understands the impact of alcoholism on your marriage can help you gain a sense of inner wisdom. By connecting to yourself, your mind, body, and spirit, you can develop a stronger sense of intuition.
The team at Wisdom Within Counseling would love to offer you, or you and your spouse, a safe place to heal after the challenges alcoholism have caused in your marriage.
