Is your romantic relationship not in a good place? Also, is your marriage or relationship with your romantic partner not going smoothly? Are you feeling unhappy, hurt, and unsatisfied in your current romantic relationship? Has an affair destroyed your trust in your spouse? Do you need help overcoming infidelity in your relationship? The affair recovery counseling specialists specialize in repairing and rebuilding trust after cheating and infidelity. To note, the couples therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling are Gottman Level 2 trained marriage therapists. Our affair recovery counseling specialists provide you tools and skills to reaffirm commitment after betrayal. Through Gottman marriage therapy, you can learn skills to repair, tune back in to each other, and build emotional intimacy. Wisdom Within Counseling supports distant couples using the evidence-based Gottman methods approach. Julie and John Gottman are renowned psychologists and relationship experts who have conducted extensive research on couples and marriage dynamics.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
An affair can be heartbreaking, shocking, saddening, and angering.
Furthermore, finding out your partner has been betraying you and keeping secrets can be devastating. In addition to finding out your partner has been having an affair, you may find them racking up credit card debt. There may be a number of different secrets in addition to affair behaviors that your spouse has been doing.
Also, when you have been cheated on, you feel suspicious and anxious all the time. When your spouse says they are getting groceries, you wonder if they are still meeting up with her affair partner. Both emotional affairs and physical affairs can be equally damaging. When you have been cheated on, you may constantly question your spouses whereabouts. As well, you may want to have their social media passwords and be able to look at their text messages anytime.
When your spouse has an affair, it’s normal to feel angry.
Anger is a normal stage of the grieving process.
Finding out your spouse has been having an affair is a grieving process. You need to take time to grieve the hopes and dreams that you had. When you got married, you thought marriage would be a place of safety and commitment. But, realizing your spouse has been having an affair, makes marriage very different.
Working with the affair recovery counseling specialists at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you and your partner rebuild your marriage foundation. Rebuilding trust and commitment are important steps in repairing your marriage.
With the help of the Wisdom Within Counseling affair recovery specialists, you can learn to build an even stronger and more stable marriage than you have ever before.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
You get a safe place to grieve the loss of the marriage that you are leaving behind, and build an even better new marriage together.
Being cheated on means that you need help processing anger, loss, sadness, frustration, betrayal, and shock.
The marriage that you thought you were creating is gone. And, the carpet you’ve known has been pulled out from underneath your feet. The world in which you thought you knew with your spouse is different overnight after an affair.
The Wisdom Within Counseling affair recovery therapists and infidelity specialists help couples love each other more deeply and honestly than ever before.
When you have the family, the career, and the perfect life, an affair can shatter everything. Finding out your partner has been cheating and keeping secrets can feel like your heart is breaking.
You may be married, but it feels like you and your partner are on different planets due to cheating.
After the affair, it is hard to trust, and you may feel suspicious. It is difficult to feel safe around your partner since they had an affair.
When you and your spouse have been close in the past, couples therapy can help you feel close, connected, and united again.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Discovering that your spouse has been keeping secrets, cheating, or having an affair can be an incredibly challenging and emotionally devastating experience.
The range of emotions you might go through can be overwhelming. And, the impact on your mental, emotional, and physical well-being can be profound. When cheated on, you may feel sad, shocked, betrayed, hurt, and angry.
Shock and disbelief
The initial reaction is often disbelief or denial. It can be difficult to accept that someone you love and trust could betray you in such a way. When you are cheated on, you may wonder how your spouse could do something like this to you. As well, you may have never thought your spouse would be unfaithful. You hear infidelity happens to other couples. However, you never think an affair would happen to your marriage.
Betrayal and hurt
You may feel an intense sense of betrayal and deep emotional pain. The person you relied on for support and love has broken that trust. On that note, the hurt from an affair can be immense. After you have found your partner having an affair, it is normal to feel a deep sense of betrayal. The solid ground that you thought you were walking on now has been shattered. You don’t know whether to believe what they say. As well, no matter what your partner does, even if they are being honest, gives you anxiety. When you have been cheated on, you may suffer from symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Anger and resentment
As reality sets in, feelings of anger and resentment may arise. You might feel angry at your spouse for their actions and resentful of the pain they have caused you. When your partner had an affair, it’s important to speak calmly. No matter how angry you may feel, yelling and criticism are unhealthy forms of communication. Though your spouse may have hurt you, it is never acceptable to retaliate in anger. Couples counseling can help you communicate in a calm and effective way when you are filled with anger.
Insecurity and self-doubt
Discovering an affair can lead to questioning your self-worth and attractiveness. You might wonder if there was something you could have done differently to prevent it. After your spouse has had an affair, you may wonder if it was because you didn’t have sex enough.
Or, you may wonder if there was something you could have done to change their unfaithfulness. You may doubt that you are attractive enough. And, overall you may feel inadequate or that you are not good enough. When your partner has an affair, it isn’t a reflection of you not being good enough. Instead, the behavior of an affair can be looked at through an analytical lens.
There can be a lot of reasons why a person has an affair. Working with our fair recovery counseling specialist can help you heal and repair from unfaithfulness. Your partner can learn to work on being more honest in their communication. As well, you can learn to let go of any insecurity and self-doubt related to their choice to have an affair.
Grief and loss
The revelation of an affair can feel like a loss of the relationship you thought you had. You may grieve the future you had envisioned together. After your spouse has an affair, you may need to take time to cry. It is normal to feel tearful and sad. There is a process of healing and letting go of what you thought you were building. Through working with our affair recovery counseling specialist, you can work together as a team to create an even brighter future. Together, you can learn to emotionally validate each other’s needs.
Confusion and ambivalence
You might experience confusion about what to do next. Deciding whether to work on the relationship or end it can be a complex and challenging process. When your spouse has cheated, you may feel withdrawn. To add, the spark and the excitement to stay married is dampened. In the past, you were excited about planning holidays, the next family vacation, and even family portraits. However, now, you experience confusion, depression, and ambivalence about your marital future. It feels like your spouse’s affair stole your joy.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists can help you connect with yourself.
After you have been cheated on, making a quick decision to separate is never a good idea. Counseling can help you verbalize your emotions to your spouse. From there, your couples therapist can help your spouse understand the complex emotions you are experiencing and nurture you more effectively. Our affair recovery counseling specialists can help you both decide if staying together or separating is best.
Fear of the unknown
Uncertainty about the future can be frightening. You might worry about the impact on your family, finances, and emotional well-being. Couples therapy can help you talk about your anxieties and fears. It is normal to feel uncertain about the future when the ground that you thought you were walking on has been shattered.
Need for answers
There is often a strong desire to understand why the affair happened. You might seek answers to questions about what led to this situation. Marriage counseling with our affair and betrayal specialist can help understand some of the issues leading up to the affair. Usually, an affair is a symptom of much larger issues in your marriage. Often times, an affair occurs about 3 to 7 years after unresolved major events.
About 1 to 7 years into the past are certain unresolved events took place that began triggering the emotional disconnection and affair.
For instance, issues may include sharing finances, moving in together, sharing a mortgage, trying to get pregnant, infertility, miscarriage, loss of a parent, loss of a child, and many more. Experiences of sexual abuse, unwanted touch, and any sort of violation can trigger an affair. Understanding the past is helpful. Working with our marriage and couples therapy specialists means that you can learn about ways to prevent an affair in the future too.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Difficulty in trusting again
After such a breach of trust, rebuilding trust can be a long and difficult journey. When your partner is unfaithful, it is normal to have a high level of anxiety. Trust is built in small moments overtime. After your partner cheats on you, the process of rebuilding trust is possible through marriage counseling. Our affair recovery counseling specialists can give you specific skills and techniques to rebuild trust. You get a safe place to verbalize and talk about how betrayal and secret keeping have hurt you.
Social and emotional isolation
Many individuals who have experienced betrayal and infidelity may feel isolated and struggle to confide in others about their situation.
Coping with the aftermath of discovering a partner’s affair is a highly personal process. Seek couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you both work through the issues.
To add, couples therapy can help you decide is ending the relationship is the best course of action. In healing from affairs, both people need prioritize self-care during this challenging time.
Couples counseling can provide you with a variety of different positive coping outlets for intense emotions.
When you feel suspicious, angry, or anxious, using holistic coping outlet will be helpful. Self-care tools such as going to sleep at a regular time and having a nourishing breakfast the next morning can be helpful. Taking care of yourself will be really important during this challenging, emotional time.
From taking good care of yourself, you can bring the most balanced version of yourself to your marriage.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists and couples therapists help you navigate your complex emotions and the steps to repair ahead.
There can be loss, grief, pain, humiliation, shock, betrayal, anger, and so many emotions around an affair.
As well, our affair recovery counseling specialists and couples therapists can pinpoint how the affair began.
For many couples, an affair is a symptom of much larger issues and crack in your marriage foundation. From there, you can get communication skills, homework, and learn to the steps to reaffirm your commitment and build trust again.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists at Wisdom Within Counseling help couples repair and rebuild commitment after cheating and secret keeping behaviors.
According to the Gottman model of marriage therapy, affairs occur for various reasons. With our affair recovery counseling specialists, you can work with a couples therapist who can identify the root causes of the affair.
There are many factors that can contribute to infidelity. Affairs don’t have to be the end or complete sabotage of your marriage.
Why do affairs occur?
Did you know that a lack of emotional connection can lead to affairs and cheating?
One of the primary reasons affairs occur is the absence of emotional connection in the primary relationship. When partners feel emotionally disconnected or neglected, they may seek emotional intimacy and validation outside of the relationship, leading to affairs.
Lack of emotional connection in a marriage can manifest in various ways, and it’s important to note that every relationship is unique. Some examples of what a lack of emotional connection may look like in a marriage are below.
Limited or superficial communication is a cause of affairs, infidelity, and cheating
Couples who lack emotional connection may engage in superficial conversations or avoid discussing deeper feelings and emotions. They might only talk about day-to-day logistics or stick to safe, surface-level topics. Marriage therapy can give you techniques for deepening emotional intimacy.
Emotional intimacy is a foundational building block to all healthy marriages. Be able to talk about emotions including frustration, sadness, anger, and guilt are all important. For many couples, talking about emotions is very uncomfortable.
Growing up, your parents may have never taught you about expressing emotions. As well, it’s hard to express and verbalize your emotions when you have never had good teachers. Couples counseling can be a safe place to learn how to use empathetic listening skills and verbalize your feelings. Talking about what you feel will be a part of affair recovery counseling. As well, if your partner struggles to identify what they are feeling, your couples therapist can help them pinpoint it.
Feeling emotionally distant is a common cause for cheating
Emotional distance between partners can be a significant sign of a lack of emotional connection. They may feel like roommates rather than intimate partners.
Many times, couples will end up in roommate syndrome. You may be really good at living together. When you are good at living together, you may both have similar habits around cleanliness, organization, and even meal prep. It was good roommates, you both clean your dishes, enjoy the same food, and like relaxing watching the tv show.
However, when you are stuck in roommate syndrome, there is emotional distance. Couples counseling can help you develop emotional closeness rather than letting the emotional distance increase.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Avoiding vulnerability is a cause of affairs, infidelity, and cheating
When emotional connection is lacking, individuals may avoid being vulnerable with each other. They may fear opening up about their fears, insecurities, or past experiences. Couples therapy can be a safe place for you to open up about your fears. Talking about what you are afraid of may seem too vulnerable.
At first, talking about your anxieties and your fears with your spouse may even feel uncomfortable. You might be afraid that your spouse will reject you or make fun of you. Fears of humiliation and fears of abandonment are very normal.
Couples counseling can be a safe place to receive professional guidance regarding emotional vulnerability. With the guidance of our affair recovery counseling specialists, you can feel more comfortable sharing your fears. Developing emotional vulnerability skills can be fun and playful too. To note, emotional vulnerability is a key component to having a healthy marriage.
Disinterest in each other’s lives is a sign of emotional disconnection
Partners may show little interest in each other’s daily experiences, hobbies, and personal pursuits. They may not celebrate each other’s successes or support each other through challenges.
For example, one spouse may choose to distance themselves or cheat. This could be a result of lack of acknowledgment or lack of praise from their spouse. Maybe, they received an award at work. Their coworkers and friends were proud of them, but their spouse seemed indifferent. When they came home feeling excited about their award, their spouse didn’t give praise. And, their spouse may have even criticized them and made them feel like they could’ve done better. These types of insensitive interactions create a recipe for an affair, secret keeping, and infidelity.
Lack of empathy and understanding is a cause of affairs, infidelity, and cheating
Emotional connection involves being able to empathize and understand each other’s feelings and perspectives. When it’s absent, partners may struggle to see things from each other’s point of view.
Empathy is an important skill for a healthy marriage.
If you and your spouse feel disconnected due to an affair, you need empathy skills. Both of you can learn to empathize with each other’s experiences. Through couples counseling, developing empathy can be playful and fun. Your couples therapist can provide different empathy building activities for you both in session.
No emotional support leads to affairs and secret keeping behaviors
In emotionally disconnected marriages, partners may not feel supported during difficult times or personal crises. They may feel alone in their struggles and emotional needs.
For example, one spouse may become tearful and sad. A spouse may be grieving the loss of their parent, loss of a job, loss of a child, or even a miscarriage. In a healthy marriage, the other spouse is emotionally attuned and aware that their partner is sad.
There are gestures of connection, closeness, and comfort in healthy marriages.
However, when one spouse disengages, this breeds an affair. And, unfaithfulness is often the result of needing emotional support from someone else outside the marriage. And, what pushes one spouse to an affair is that their spouse turned their back. A spouse who does not care about their partners personal issues can create a breeding ground for an affair.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Absence of affection and intimacy is a sign of emotional disconnection
Emotional connection is closely tied to physical affection and intimacy. When emotional connection is lacking, physical intimacy may also decline or feel disconnected.
Now, when one partner desires physical touch and connection, but the other partner keeps rejecting them, this can breed an affair. Sex should never be a chore, obligation, or duty. However, one spouse may feel that sex and touch are necessary for them to feel loved, significant, and wanted. When touch is withheld or restricted by their spouse, this spouse may begin to feel insignificant, and unloved.
Frequent conflicts and unresolved issues can contribute to cheating
An absence of emotional connection can lead to frequent conflicts that are left unresolved. Communication breakdowns and unresolved issues can further deepen the emotional distance.
Criticism, yelling, putting each other down, name-calling, and doors slamming are all negative communication tactics. Emotional distance increases when criticism and defensiveness increase. Marriage counseling with our affair and betrayal recovery specialists can help you find alternatives to criticizing one another.
When you have intense conflicts, learning how to regulate each other and diffuse the conflict are important skills. In marriage therapy, you get a safe place to learn how to resolve conflict and communicate more effectively. Instead of leaving issues unresolved, you can learn how to talk about them and process them together.
Many times, after couples therapy, partners feel closer and more connected by improving in communication.
Emotional withdrawal is a sign of emotional disconnection
One or both partners may emotionally withdraw from the relationship, avoiding interactions and emotional engagement.
Prioritizing external relationships can cause affairs, infidelity, and cheating
When emotional connection is lacking within the marriage, partners may seek emotional support and connection from friends or other external sources instead of each other.
Feeling emotionally lonely is a sign of emotional disconnection
In emotionally disconnected marriages, one or both partners may experience a sense of loneliness, even when physically together.
It’s important to remember that experiencing one or more of these signs doesn’t necessarily mean a marriage is doomed. Many couples face periods of disconnection and can work together to rebuild emotional intimacy.
Seeking professional help through couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling can be beneficial in addressing these issues. Working with our affair recovery counseling specialists can help you both in fostering a healthier emotional connection skills within your marriage.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Have you been experiencing criticism and communication issues?
To note, poor communication between you and your partner can lead to misunderstandings, unmet needs, and unresolved conflicts. So often, affairs are not a one time experience. When unmet needs and unresolved conflicts do not get resolved through couples therapy, affair behaviors never really go away. What this means is that infidelity becomes a negative coping mechanism.
A person who feels stressed, lonely, overwhelmed, or unwanted may continue secretive, affair behaviors without the right kind of couples therapy. Affair behaviors can be self-sabotaging often times. Katie Ziskind and the team at Wisdom Within Counseling specialize in affair recovery therapy.
Overall, a breakdown in communication creates a sense of distance, loneliness, and frustration that can lead to affairs. Couples therapy helps to address the root issues that push one or both partners towards finding solace elsewhere. Instead, you can gain positive communication skills and learn how to verbalize emotions. Verbalizing emotions and better communication skills can prevent future affair behaviors.
The Wisdom Within Counseling affair recovery counseling specialists teach couples healthy communication skills. These skills promote trust, commitment, affection, and connection. In turn, trust, commitment, affection, and connection prevent future affairs.
The Wisdom Within Counseling affair recovery counseling specialists teach positive communication skills to prevent infidelity, unfaithfulness, and secret keeping.
Criticism, defensivness, yelling, explosive anger, unresolved communication issues lead to affairs and infidelity behaviors. To add, criticism, defensiveness, yelling, explosive anger, and unresolved communication issues can create a toxic and unhealthy environment within a relationship.
When these negative dynamics persist, they can contribute to a breakdown in emotional connection and intimacy. Emotional pain, emotional hurt, and anger issues indirectly lead to affairs and infidelity. You can learn how to communicate in positive ways to stay close and connected.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Here’s how yelling, anger issues, criticism, and defensivness can play a role in infidelity and affairs:
Lack of emotional safety can lead to affairs and cheating
Constant criticism, yelling, and explosive anger create an environment where one or both partners feel emotionally unsafe. One or both of you may feel attacked, judged, or belittled. When you feel hurt, criticized, or emotionally lonely, these make it difficult to be vulnerable and open with each other.
To note, emotional vulnerability skills are a key foundational piece for a meaningful, honest, and loving marriage.
Emotional disconnection lead to affairs and cheating
Unresolved communication issues and defensive behavior can result in emotional disconnection between partners.
In general, unresolved communication issues make couples feel distant and isolated from each other. This emotional distance can make you feel on different planets. Or, you may feel like roommates. A sense of loneliness within your marriage or relationship can be a root cause for affairs and infidelity behaviors.
Seeking validation and understanding from someone else can create marital foundation cracks
When someone feels constantly criticized or yelled at by their partner, they may seek validation and understanding elsewhere. This can make them vulnerable to forming connections with others who seem empathetic. We all want our significant other to be non-judgmental. So, when a person experiences the opposite, this leads to emotional affairs and sexual affairs.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Escaping the relationship problems can be a reason for affair behaviors
Explosive anger and unresolved communication issues can be overwhelming for both partners. Your or your partner may seek solace outside your romantic relationship to escape the conflicts and negative interactions at home.
Emotional and physical neglect can push partners apart
Constant defensiveness and unresolved communication problems can result in emotional and physical neglect within your romantic relationship.
If one partner feels their emotional needs are consistently unmet, they may be tempted to seek attention, affection, and validation from others. Unmet emotional needs lead to pain and hurt. At Wisdom Within Counseling, in marriage therapy, you can learn emotional intimacy skills. Essentially, emotional intimacy skills support a strong, secure, and positive marital bond.
Repeated hurt and resentment contribute to affairs and betrayals
When negative dynamics are left unresolved, hurt and resentment can build over time. To add, the emotional pain can become a driving factor for seeking emotional or physical connections outside the marriage. Learning what each other is feeling can be a part of couples therapy. Many times, couples are not sharing emotions with each other. So, marriage counseling can be a safe place to learn how to use, “I feel,” statements.
It is essential to recognize that affairs and infidelity are complex issues that can be influenced by a variety of factors. The affair recovery counseling specialists can better understand the root causes of the pain and heartbreak in your marriage.
Furthermore, negative relationship dynamics, such as criticism, defensiveness, yelling, explosive anger, and unresolved communication issues can erode the foundation of trust and emotional intimacy in your marriage.
Connecting to the feelings you have can be a part of meeting with our affair recovery counseling specialists. Couples can learn to share and verbalize their feelings more clearly. Learning to talk about abandonment, loneliness, and talking about conflicts is key in affair recovery counseling. You can start to close the gaps in your marriage’s foundation.
Wisdom Within Counseling can help you address and resolve issues through open communication, empathy, and emotional intimacy tools. Working with an affair recovery professional at Wisdom Within Counseling help can help you and your partner rebuild trust and emotional connection. You get to learn new bonding techniques and skills, thus reducing the likelihood of affairs and infidelity.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Unmet needs and desires can lead to affairs and infidelity
As well, you or your spouse may engage in affairs when physical or emotional needs are not being met. Many times, couples don’t feel comfortable talking about sex, intimacy, female sexual anatomy, oral sex, BDSM, sex toys, and orgasming.
In couples therapy for affair recovery, you can become safe and comfortable talking about sex and intimacy. Marriage counseling topics can include desires for oral sex, BDSM, novelty, excitement, adventure, or sexual intimacy that are lacking.
Unmet emotional, sexual, and physical needs in your marriage can create feelings of dissatisfaction and emotional distance between partners.
Here are some examples of what these unmet needs might look like:
Emotional needs:
At Wisdom Within Counseling, our affair recovery counseling specialists can help pinpoint if there is a lack of emotional support during challenging times or personal struggles.
As well, you can talk about feeling unheard or dismissed when trying to communicate feelings or concerns.
If there is an absence of affection, compliments, or expressions of love and appreciation, these are unmet emotional needs.
Not feeling emotionally connected or understood by your partner can be emotionally painful and distressing.
Feeling emotionally neglected or ignored can be very painful and lead to affairs and infidelity.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Sexual needs:
At Wisdom Within Counseling, you can start talking about sex. If you have significant differences in sexual desire or frequency of intimacy, talking about them is a good start.
Feeling unsatisfied or unfulfilled in the bedroom can lead to feelings of loneliness, low self-esteem, and self-consciousness.
Lack of sexual exploration or experimentation can lead to boredom. Couples therapy can be a safe place to develop sexual excitement and rebuild sexual desire.
An absence of emotional intimacy during sexual encounters makes sex feel like a chore or obligation.
When there is an inability to openly discuss sexual desires and preferences with your partner, you have a crack in your marriage foundation. At Wisdom Within Counseling, our affair recovery counseling specialists can help you rebuild trust, commitment, sexual passion, intimacy, and sexual desire.
Physical needs:
In general, a lack of physical affection, such as hugging, kissing, or holding hands can really harm your connection.
Furthermore, feeling distant or disconnected during physical intimacy can be harmful.
Notably, not receiving physical touch or contact from your partner can be so saddening and lead to feelings of unwantedness.
Feeling unattractive or undesirable to your spouse can lead to an affair and infidelity.
Plus, physical neglect or lack of attention to each other’s physical well-being is not good for your marriage or connection.
To note, unmet needs can be subjective and vary from person to person. So, couples therapy can be a safe place to explore, talk, and understand what needs you both have. Often, distant couples are not talking about needs or desires openly. What one individual perceives as an unmet need may not be the same for another person.
Additionally, unmet needs can evolve over time as relationships change and individuals grow. Your couples therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling can help translate and help you communicate your needs in a way your partner can understand.
Unaddressed unmet needs can lead to frustration, resentment, affairs and emotional disconnection in a marriage.
It is crucial for partners to communicate openly and honestly about their needs and desires. More so, marriage therapy can help you learn to work together to find solutions and compromises that nurture emotional, sexual, and physical intimacy in your relationship.
Couples therapy and marriage counseling with an affair specialist can also be helpful in addressing these deep issues.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists at Wisdom Within help distant couples in fostering a healthier and more fulfilling connection and repair trust.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Did you know that an affair and alcoholism can be attempts to escaping problems or stress in an unhealthy way?
Overall, some people turn to affairs as a way to escape from personal problems, stress, or unhappiness in their current relationship or other areas of life. An affair might temporarily provide distraction or relief, but it often exacerbates existing issues.
Also, affairs and alcoholism can both serve as numbing behaviors, meaning they are used as negative coping mechanisms. Alcoholism and affairs are behaviors to avoid or suppress uncomfortable emotions or difficult issues in your marriage.
Here’s how each of these behaviors can contribute to marital problems:
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Affairs are self-sabotaging and numbing behaviors:
Escape from emotional pain
Engaging in an affair can be an escape from the emotional pain or dissatisfaction one might be experiencing in their marriage. Infidelity and cheating provides a temporary distraction and may offer feelings of excitement, validation, or connection that are missing within your marriage.
Avoiding communication and intimacy
When you or your spouse seek emotional or physical connection outside your marriage, you both unfortunately avoid addressing the underlying issues. This avoidance can perpetuate a lack of emotional intimacy. Numbing and avoidance behaviors don’t improve communication in your marriage, further contributing to deep problems.
Emotional disconnection
Also, affairs can lead to emotional distance between partners. The person involved in the affair may become emotionally invested in the affair relationship. Affairs and infidelity leave the spouse at home feeling betrayed, hurt, alone, neglected, and isolated.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Alcoholism is a self-sabotaging, numbing behavior the goes along with infidelity:
Emotional self-medication
Also, alcohol can be used as a way to self-medicate and numb emotional pain, stress, or unresolved issues within your marriage. This numbing effect may provide temporary relief from negative emotions. But, alcoholism and affairs exacerbate problems in the long run.
Impaired communication
Additionally, alcohol abuse can lead to impaired judgment and communication difficulties. Alcoholism makes it challenging for couples to engage in productive and open conversations about their feelings and concerns.
Escalating conflicts
Alcohol can lower inhibitions and contribute to aggressive behavior. Conflicts may get heated and intense, leading to arguments and conflicts that may further strain your marriage. Alcoholism and affairs often go hand in hand when it comes to self-sabotaging ways to cope.
Neglecting responsibilities
If one partner struggles with alcoholism, their focus may shift away from fulfilling marital responsibilities, resulting in a lack of emotional and practical support for their spouse.
In both cases, affairs and alcoholism can act as distractions or coping mechanisms that prevent couples from addressing the underlying issues within their marriage.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Numbing behaviors often compound existing problems, leading to increased emotional distance, lack of trust, and diminished intimacy.
Also, alcoholism and affairs can create a vicious cycle where the issues in the marriage are not adequately addressed.
Self-sabotaging behaviors lead to further reliance on numbing behaviors as a means of escape.
Addressing affairs and alcoholism in a marriage requires a willingness to confront and work through the root causes of these behaviors.
Seeking professional help through couples therapy and affair recovery counseling, is crucial in addressing these issues. You can learn to cope with stress, loneliness, and unmet needs in positive, healthy ways.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, you can work on skills for rebuilding trust, and commitment again.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists help you in fostering a healthier, more trusting, and more connected relationship.
A lack of commitment can lead to affairs
Fears of commitment or a history of commitment issues can lead to infidelity and affair behaviors.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
How can couples rebuild commitment and trust after affairs and cheating?
Rebuilding commitment and trust after affairs and cheating is a challenging, but worthwhile process.
With dedication, open communication, and consistent effort from both partners, our affair recovery counseling specialists can help.
The team at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you take steps to work towards healing and rebuilding safety, security, and trust in your relationship.
Steps for affair recovery that you can learn about in couples counseling with our affair recovery counseling specialists:
Honesty and transparency
The partner who had the affair must be completely honest about what happened, why it happened, and take responsibility for their actions. This transparency is crucial to rebuilding trust and understanding the full extent of the breach.
Open communication
Both partners should commit to open, non-defensive communication. They should express their feelings, concerns, and needs honestly and listen to each other with empathy and understanding. Couples may stumble or get stuck in conflicts when talking. So, working with the affair recovery counseling specialists at Wisdom Within Counseling can improve healthy communication skills.
Seek professional help from our affair recovery counseling specialists at Wisdom Within Counseling
At Wisdom Within Counseling, you can work with our qualified couples therapists who specialize in infidelity and relationship issues.
Your marriage therapist can help facilitate productive conversations, provide tools for communication, and offer strategies for rebuilding trust.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Set boundaries and expectations
Essentially, part of recovering from an affair means establishing clear boundaries and expectations for the future. Boundaries ensure that both partners understand what is required to rebuild trust. In couples therapy, you can discuss commitments to monogamy, transparency, and learn ways to strengthen the relationship.
Allow time for healing after an affair
Healing and rebuilding trust take time. If you are betrayed, it is normal to feel anxious, hurt, and sad. You will be grieving the marriage you thought you were building. If you cheated, you make feel shame, guilt, regret, anger at yourself, and even self-hatred.
In couples counseling, you can process betrayal, anxiety, suspicion, and sadness. Both partners should be patient and allow themselves the space to process emotions and work through the painful aftermath of the affair. In marriage therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can develop self-care and self-soothing skills.
Take responsibility for relationship issues
Our affair recovery counseling specialists can help you acknowledge that affairs often occur in the context of pre-existing relationship problems. The unfortunate recipe for an affair builds years into the past. Looking back at the past issues can help you process the affair and infidelity.
Both partners should be willing to address their individual and shared issues to foster a healthier relationship moving forward. A mixture of couples therapy and individual therapy can be beneficial in infidelity recovery.
Engage in activities together to recover from affairs and infidelity
Participating in shared activities and experiences can help rekindle emotional connection. Think of hobbies in addition to time set aside for couples counseling. Yoga, gardening, ice skating, walking on the beach, and even dancing lessons can strengthen the bond between you and your partner.
Show appreciation and affection in the affair recovery process
Also, small acts of kindness, compliments, and expressions of love can help restore emotional intimacy and create a positive atmosphere.
Be accountable and rebuild trustworthiness in the affair recovery process
The partner who had the affair should be consistent in their efforts to regain trust. This includes being accountable for their actions, honest, being reliable, and demonstrating trustworthiness over time.
Forgive and let go
Furthermore, forgiveness is a gradual process that takes time.
Both partners need to work on forgiving each other and themselves for past mistakes. Couples therapy can support forgiveness activities.
It’s essential to let go of resentment and focus on building a new marital foundation.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Rebuilding trust after an affair is a complex and delicate process that Wisdom Within Counseling specializes in
Healing your marriage after an affair and lying requires dedication, vulnerability, and a willingness to work through difficult emotions and challenges. Working with an affair recovery and infidelity specialist at Wisdom Within Counseling is a key part of this process. Many “generalist” therapists do not have extensive training in couples counseling. The team of marriage therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling are infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists. Our marriage therapists give you homework, tools, and techniques to rebuild after infidelity, affairs, and lying has harmed your connection.
It is essential to note that the occurrence of affairs is a complex and multi-faceted phenomenon.
Not every affair follows the same patterns or reasons. Additionally, each individual’s circumstances and motivations may vary. At Wisdom Within Counseling, the marriage therapists are Gottman level two trained.
The Gottmans’ research aims to shed light on the underlying factors that can contribute to affairs. Your couples therapist will personalize therapy to help you learn the communication skills you need. There is no one-size-fits-all explanation for why affairs happen, but often multiple cracks in your marriage that have been building for years.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
A holistic marriage therapy approach to affair recovery counseling
At Wisdom Within Counseling, you can choose from traditional talk counseling, art, painting, watercolor, clay, walk and talk in nature by the beach, and holistic therapies.
Couples in counseling with our affair recovery counseling specialists can take part in music therapy (guitar, various drums, ect). And, we specialize and are trained in Gottman marriage therapy.
Yoga therapy, meditation, and mindfulness breathing skills can be soothing. These self-regulation tools help you practice self-care and ground yourself.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
You can pick from unique options beyond traditional sitting and talking. Holistic therapies can help you connect to your mind and body.
As well, somatic therapies offer self soothing and can be a positive coping outlet. As you know, affairs, lying, and alcoholism are negative coping tools. By replacing negative tools with healthy ones, you can develop a stronger marriage and bond.
Art, yoga, music, and yoga therapies are a language beyond words from healing from trauma. You can use colors or sounds to express how you are feeling and gain a sense of closeness with your spouse.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, the affair recovery counseling specialists help couples communicate through art, music, and mind body therapies.
Holistic, mind body, and somatic therapies after trauma and loss help to improve emotional coping tools. As well, holistic, mind body therapies help you recover from trauma events, and gain healthy outlets for anxiety and stress in addition to words.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
How can couples therapy with affair recovery counseling specialists support my spouse and I after an affair?
Couples therapy with our affair recovery counseling specialists can be an invaluable lifeline in repairing your connection.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, we specialize in supporting you and your spouse after an affair. One of our Gottman marriage therapist will help guide you both through the healing process.
You gain new skills which facilitate open communication, allowing you to address the complex emotions. As well, you can become emotionally vulnerable and talk about challenges from the aftermath of infidelity.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists create a safe space for open communication
Your marriage therapist who specializes in affairs and infidelity provides a safe and neutral environment for both of you to express your feelings, concerns, and perspectives. And, we ensure you can do so without fear of judgment or escalation of conflicts.
Open communication skills are essential for understanding each other’s experiences and working towards resolution.
Begin addressing underlying issues with the Wisdom Within Counseling affair recovery therapy specialists
At Wisdom Within Counseling, you get to work with a skilled affair and infidelity therapist who can can help uncover the underlying issues that contributed to the affair.
These could include communication breakdowns, unmet emotional needs, unresolved conflicts, or past traumas.
Addressing these root causes is crucial for preventing infidelity in the future.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Rebuild trust with our affair recovery counseling specialists and couples therapists
Rebuilding trust is a central aspect of recovering from an affair.
Your marriage therapist can guide you through trust-building exercises. Our affair recovery counseling specialists facilitate honest communication about the affair. Then, our team of couples counselors helps establish a plan for rebuilding trust and security over time.
Learn tools for managing intense emotions calmly at Wisdom Within Counseling
After an affair, both partners are likely to experience a range of intense emotions such as anger, hurt, betrayal, guilt, and shame. All feelings are okay. However, it is never okay to hit, self-harm, yell in your spouse face, or break or damage property. If you experience self-harm, cutting, break or damage property or hit, individual therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling will be helpful alongside couples counseling.
Your couples therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you navigate these emotions in a healthy and constructive way.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Develop coping strategies with our affair recovery counseling specialists and marriage therapists
Coping with the aftermath of an affair can be overwhelming. The therapist can teach you and your spouse effective coping strategies to deal with emotional triggers, stress, and anxiety related to the affair.
Establish new boundaries at Wisdom Within Counseling
Our affair recovery counseling specialists can assist you both in setting clear boundaries and expectations for the future of your relationship.
This includes discussing commitments to rebuilding your relationship, transparency, and open communication.
Enhance your communication skills with your affair recovery counseling specialist
Effective communication is vital for any relationship.
Your couples therapist can teach both of you essential communication skills, such as active listening and assertive expression of needs and emotions.
Our affair recovery counseling specialists support forgiveness and healing
Further, forgiveness is a process that takes time and effort. Your marriage therapist can support you both in working towards forgiveness and healing. This may mean helping you understand the impact of the affair and the path towards letting go of resentment.
Explore new relationship dynamics at Wisdom Within Counseling
After an affair, the dynamics of the relationship may need to shift.
Your marriage therapist can help you explore new ways of relating to each other, fostering emotional intimacy, and rebuilding the connection.
To begin, book your phone consult to work with our infidelity and affair recovery counseling specialists.
Decide about the future of the relationship with our affair recovery counseling specialists
Couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling can also be helpful in assisting you both in making decisions.
You can gain clarity about the future of your romantic relationship. Whether you choose to rebuild and move forward together or decide to separate, marriage therapy provides guidance and support.
Couples therapy with our affair recovery counseling specialists can be a powerful tool in navigating this process.
Remember that rebuilding a relationship after an affair is a challenging journey, and progress may not be linear.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, we would love to help you foster healing, and rebuild a stronger, more meaningful, closer, and more resilient relationship.
