Have found yourself in a relationship, where you and your partner are in a trauma bond? Or, do you recognize that your romantic partner has a trauma bond still with their ex? Have also had a trauma bond with a narcissistic, emotionally, or physically abusive parent in your childhood? Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey can help you better understand the trauma bonds you’ve had in the past. You can stop bringing out the worst in each other in conflicts from counseling. Marriage counseling with a focus on complex trauma can help you both learn how to create a more positive, secure attachment in your current relationship, rather than re-trigger each other.
How can trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling help you understand complex trauma?
When you have a history of childhood trauma, neglect, and abuse, you may be more likely to be on the look out and identify trauma bonds. Maybe, you can see a trauma bond that your current partner has with their ex still. Essentially, when you are dating someone new or married to a new partner, you may notice that they still communicate in emotionally charged ways with their ex.
Your new spouse or partner may be raising a child with their ex, and now you are noticing that they have a high conflict relationship still, even though they are no longer together. This is a sign that your new spouse has a trauma bond with their ex.
Did you know that experiencing childhood abuse and neglect sets you up for a trauma bond and plays a role in your current marital conflicts?
Also, both you and your current partner may have experience childhood abuse, neglect, and emotional trauma. This can lead to more intense conflicts.
Experiencing narcissistic abuse from your parents in childhood can make both you and your partner more susceptible to developing your own dysfunctional trauma bond.
Being trauma bonded isn’t necessarily permanent. But, being in a trauma bond romantically can lead to more intense emotional arguments, emotional pain, and hurtful experiences.
Learning about your attachment styles that developed from relationships with your abusive parents and narcissistic caregivers in childhood can help you both learn how to emotionally reassure each other in your marriage.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can be a safe place to take a look at your emotional neglect, physical abuse, and other traumas from childhood and how you have impacted you both. Without realizing it at the time, you are shaped by having an alcoholic parent. You are shaped by having a narcissistic mother, or an emotionally neglectful father who abandoned you. As well, you may have experienced different natural disasters, hurricanes, wars, or observed domestic violence growing up. All of these traumas can create dysfunctional relationship dynamics in adulthood, especially in a new marriage or a new relationship.
And, because you have experience of using neglect and childhood, more than anything, you want a secure, loving romantic relationship right now. When you fight and argue, you feel like you are on different planets, and so alone. Fighting triggers panic, anxiety, and fear of abandonment and loss in you. And, you want to feel safe, sound, and reassured rather than in flight, fight, and freeze mode.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you create a secure, caring, emotionally bonded marriage.
In general, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you talk about the effects of trauma bonding with an abusive, narcissistic parent. Growing up, having a narcissistic parent who is highly critical, emotionally and physically abusive leads to a trauma bonded relationship.
Your narcissistic parent never let you express your true emotions. And, growing up, you felt small, helpless, shamed, and hurt. As well, your narcissistic and emotionally abusive parent never showed you genuine connection or real love.
Growing up with a narcissistic parent, you got a lot of blame pushed on you. As well, growing up, you were constantly being accused of something you didn’t do. Your narcissistic mother or emotionally abusive father labeled your emotions for you inaccurately. You felt dismissed, blamed, criticized, and invalidated emotionally.
Instead of a healthy loving home growing up, love was conditional. Your emotionally abusive, narcissistic parent withheld love. They told you that their problems were your fault. As a result, you may have had to keep “the peace,” and stay quiet. As well, you had to keep secrets for your narcissistic parents growing up.
Growing up, your flight, fight, and freeze trauma responses in your body were always on alert mode due to having narcissistic, emotionally abusive parents.
You had to grow up in a sense of survival. You never had the chance to be a playful child growing up. Taking care of your narcissistic parent’s emotions and your siblings was your full time job as a child.
Due to childhood trauma and emotional neglect, your body is more adapted to survival mode and more on alert for danger. You got into flight, fight, and freeze survival modes when in current romantic conflicts. To note, this means that in your current conflicts with your new romantic partner or new spouse, you may have challenges regulating your emotions.
You might find yourself in a state of panic much more easily due to fears of abandonment and loss being triggered in conflicts. Due to childhood trauma and a trauma bond with your emotionally abusive, narcissistic parent, you may get more angry or emotionally flooded. Conflicts tend to get escalated and out of hand in your marriage.
In fights, you both trigger each other, making each other feel wrong, small, helpless, criticized, and invalid all over again. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you stop re-triggering each other in conflicts. Instead, marriage counseling can help you both support each other in feeling valued, loved, appreciated, praised, desired, cared for, and special.
Essentially, growing up when your body had to always be in fight, flight, or freeze responses, you are more likely to shift into those in your romantic relationship conflict.
How can trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling help you stop re-triggering each other in current marital conflicts?
It might be hard for you to verbalize your emotional needs right now in a fight because you feel like it wasn’t safe do you speak up as a child. Due to narcissistic abuse and emotional trauma, your voice never mattered growing up. If anything, you were taught to put a happy face on and stuff your emotions inside.
And, in your romantic relationship and marriage now, you may struggle to verbalize your emotional needs. Not feeling safe to verbalize your emotional needs may be out of fear of rejection or fear of abandonment. You don’t want your partner to leave, so you continue to hold it in, just like you did in childhood.
When you spoke up in your childhood, your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent made it your fault, or made a comment that made you feel inferior, helpless and blamed. So, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you speak up in your romantic relationship now. Marriage counseling with our complex trauma bond specialists can help you overcome the fear your partner leaving you if you do speak up.
Fight, flight, and freeze responses are your body going into survival mode and get triggered in marital conflicts.
Your body had to go into survival mode growing up because you were surviving childhood trauma and abuse. But now, with your romantic partner, you can learn through trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, how to build a sound, safe, and secure connection.
Couples counseling with our complex trauma bond specialists can help you speak up. You can begin to feel empowered to have a voice in your relationship from trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling.
As well, you can begin to feel confident talking about your feelings and your emotional experience with your spouse or with your new partner. Through couples counseling with our complex trauma specialists, you can talk about how experiencing narcissistic abuse, childhood neglect, and trauma from an alcoholic parent really impacted you.
Your partner can learn to love you, reassure you, and emotionally care for your trauma wounds.
You don’t have to re-trigger each other any longer.
Instead for re-triggering each other, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you support each other in feeling appreciated, loved, cared for, and emotionally validated.
You might be more reluctant to be yourself or feel like you have to please your partner due to narcissistic abuse in childhood. This is because you had to please your narcissistic parent or alcoholic parent and childhood. You had to make sure your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent didn’t have another anger episode or manic episode. Growing up, life was chaotic, and you felt you had to keep your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent happy.
To note, these people pleasing behaviors may transfer into your romantic relationship. And, people pleasing is what part of what makes your romantic relationship and marriage characteristic of another trauma bond.
Couples counseling can be a crucial lifeline when you and your spouse find yourself trapped in a trauma bond within your marriage.
When you are in a trauma bond, you are in a powerful emotional connection that forms between you and your partner who have experienced intense emotional or physical pain together.
In the context of your marriage, your trauma bond can be a result of shared experiences of trauma, abuse, or other challenging circumstances.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling provides a safe and supportive environment for both of you to explore and understand the dynamics of your relationship. Our trauma bond specializes help you and your spouse break free from the harmful, hurtful cycle of your trauma bond.
One significant benefit of couples counseling with our trauma bond specialists in a trauma bond is the opportunity for open communication.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, your couples therapist is trained to facilitate a safe space where both of you can express your emotions, fears, and concerns without judgment. This can be especially crucial when dealing with the aftermath of childhood and relational trauma. Without professional help, open and effective communication is often hindered by the emotional weight of past trauma experiences.
Moreover, trauma bond couples counseling can help you and your spouse identify and understand the patterns of behavior that contribute to your dysfunctional trauma bond.
Our marriage therapists can guide you in recognizing unhealthy dynamics and provide tools to break free from destructive cycles. This self-awareness is a crucial step towards healing and rebuilding a healthier, more resilient relationship.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey also offers you both guidance in developing coping mechanisms and strategies to deal with the impact of trauma on your relationship.
To add, our marriage therapists introduce techniques to manage stress, anxiety, and triggers that can contribute to the trauma bond. Likewise learning healthy ways to navigate challenging emotions and situations together can strengthen your ability to overcome the effects of past trauma.
The therapeutic process in couples counseling encourages empathy and understanding between you and your partner.
By delving into each other’s perspectives and experiences, you can can develop a deeper connection and compassion. This empathetic understanding is fundamental in breaking the trauma bond and rebuilding trust within your marriage and relationship.
In addition to addressing the impact of past trauma, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey focuses on creating a positive vision for the future.
Our marriage therapists work with you both to set realistic goals, foster a sense of shared purpose, and develop strategies for building a healthier, more fulfilling relationship. This forward-looking approach can empower you both to move beyond your trauma bond and actively participate in the creation of a more resilient, loving, and harmonious partnership.
Ultimately, trauma bond couples counseling at Wisdom Within Counseling can be a transformative process when you are trapped in a trauma bond within your marriage.
By providing a structured and supportive environment, your marriage therapist helps you break free from destructive patterns. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you gain calm, open communication, and embark on a journey of healing and growth together.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you feel both of autonomy and independence as well as a sense of co-regulation and co-nurturing.
Right now, you are yelling at each other, getting snappy, or emotionally shutting down. Maybe, you give each other the silent treatment, and all verbal communication stops. These dysfunctional forms of communication only perpetuate disconnection, distance, and conflicts. Instead of shutting down emotionally, yelling, or name calling, you can learn to comfort each other.
Co-regulation is an experience where when feeling panic or upset, you and your partner learn how to lean on each other. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you both learn to comfort each other. You can learn to validate each other, rather than criticize, re-trigger, and yell at each other.
Trauma bond marriage therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you breaking survival mechanism habits of fight, flight and freeze.
Let’s talk about trauma responses and how they play into current marital fights.
When you get into a conflict with your romantic partner, you might be inclined to run away. Or, when you experience conflict in your romantic relationship, you might be inclined to get angry, explode, slam doors, and yell. Perhaps, you freeze up and you lose all verbal ability, and you just get silent. Essentially, running away is a form of abandoning your romantic relationship because you feel overwhelmed, criticized, and unsure of what to do next. That feeling of wanting to run away is the flight response.
When you get angry, say mean things, yell back, and call your partner names, it hurts your marriage. Due to past, trauma an angry response is the fight trauma response.
And, when you feel like you can’t talk, you freeze. The freeze trauma response is often seen in marriage conflicts as the silent treatment. To note, these are unhealthy communication mechanisms that can develop when you have faced childhood abuse and narcissistic abuse from your parent.
These dysfunctional, negative responses helped you survive in childhood, but no longer serve you. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling help you both learn alternative ways to respond, than from fight, flight, and freeze. From learning how to emotionally validate each other, you can start to build a secure, loving, meaningful bond.
Couples counseling with our trauma bond specialists in New Jersey can help you shift from fight, flight, and freeze reactions, which only lead to more frustrating conflict.
Right now, there is a level of tension and hostility in your relationship. And, right now, you feel disconnected, but deeply want a secure, safe, and intimate bond. For one, you can stop pleasing your partner out of obligation or fear, to pleasing your partner because it makes you feel good.
And, from trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, your romantic partner or spouse can understand how to you emotionally reassure you. Emotional reassurance is key in creating and supporting a secure marital bond.
Couples therapy with our complex trauma bond specialists can be a safe place to talk about childhood trauma, the effect of having an alcoholic mother, or narcissistic father.
The challenges you are having in your marriage may be caused by you both re-triggering each other, creating a hostile home environment. In marriage counseling, you can learn exactly how to support a safe, loving, supportive connection.
From trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can help each other feel loved, safe, supported, valued, appreciated, and desired again.
As well, couples therapy with our complex trauma bond specialists can help you break the cycle of abuse.
Often times, when you experience childhood abuse and trauma, you never get to see positive role models.
Your trauma bond marriage therapist at Wisdom Within Counseling in Hoboken, New Jersey can provide you with positive role modeling, and show you healthy communication skills. This way you can become conscious of the generational patterns you want to break. You don’t have to react from fight, flight, and freeze and perpetuate the cycle of emotional and physical abuse.
Marriage therapy with our complex trauma bond specialists in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can be a safe place to talk about your emotional experience in your romantic relationship.
For instance, you can talk about ambivalence, anxiety, fears of loss, how to handle conflicts. In your romantic relationship, you may feel unsure of how to handle the situation when both of you get angry and upset.
Additionally, sex and intimacy can be a big a topic for your couples therapy sessions. You may have put sex on the back burner due to emotional issues in your romantic relationship. All playful touch has vanished. Did you know that gentle, loving touch can be calming?
In a healthy relationship and marriage, there is a need for healthy, loving touch. Then, that soothing touch can be useful in moments of anxiety, to foster reassurance. As well, healthy, loving touch can evolve into sexual, romantic, and flirty touch. As a result of disconnection, anger, and emotional distance, you may no longer be sexually active together.
Due to anger and explosive fights, you may not feel comfortable being sexually intimate or sexually open with your partner anymore.
Constant disconnection is a form of current relationship trauma. Being upset with each other and feeling tense can lead to sex life issues. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you shift into a positive pattern of connection and emotional intimacy.
When your partner slams doors or calls you names, you feel unsafe emotionally with them. It is normal to feel like you have to protect yourself when your partner is emotionally dysregulated.
Furthermore, when your current romantic partner or spouse threatens separation or divorce in a fight, even if they don’t truly mean it, you start to feel unsafe. This can lead you to feel unsafe opening up sexually.
Emotional intimacy and emotional connection are important foundational elements for having a healthy sex life.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, your couples therapist teaches you how emotional intimacy and sexual connection are a positive feedback loop.
Without emotional intimacy, you can’t have sexual intimacy. Healthy touch is a key part of having a loving marriage. For instance, holding hands can lower your heart rate and stress level. Couples counseling can help you give and receive healthy touch when it comes to resolving conflict. As well, you can begin using healthy touch in your marriage to bond, be close, and soothe each other.
Healthy touch is important when it comes to de-escalating fights and bringing you both into a calm place.
Emotional connection supports erotic, pleasurable, and sexual touch. And, sexual intimacy and having a regular sex life also provides emotional connection in your marriage. Many times, we lose touch with our sexuality, sexuality, and eroticism due to trauma, conflict, stress of life, and more. Marriage counseling helps you regain a sense of healthy, loving touch in your relationship. Sex can be a form of deep bonding, closeness, and deep intimacy. But, it is often taken off the table when couples are in an argument and conflict.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey can support both emotional and sexual connection
When you learn to communicate about emotions and express yoru feelings, you can learn to talk about sex. What you like to feel sexually desired and wanted may change over time. If you are in an uncomfortable sexual position, you can learn to speak up about what feels more pleasurable. Often, our culture puts too much pressure on having a hard penis and living up to unrealistic expectations around sex from pornography. Sex doesn’t just have to be one way all the time. You can have varied, diverse sexual experiences that are playful, erotic, and build your sexual desire.
How can marriage counseling help you improve sexual intimacy for a better relationship?
In addition to speaking up and communicating together, real life sex has a variety of emotional moments. Pornography often portrays sex being a specific way. And, when your real life sexual experiences are different than what you see in pornography, you may feel inadequate. For a better sexual connection and sex life, it is important to stop comparing your real life sexual moments to pornography. Pornography can be sexually arousing, but your real life partner experiences will be different than what is portrayed in pornography.
Counseling with our Hoboken, New Jersey marriage therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you develop sexual resiliency, playfulness, and let go of performance pressure.
Sexual intimacy and sexual pleasure is an opportunity to explore each other and bond deeply. Emotional closeness helps lay strong foundation for sexual desire and erotic playfulness. And, having a regular, fun, passionate sex life supports emotional closeness and bonding.
With our marriage therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can talk about what makes you feel safe and unsafe during sexual experiences. Emotional safety and sexual safety go hand in hand.
Likewise, talking about sex, talking about what feels good sexually, and communicating about sex are keys to a healthy sex life. Having good conversations around emotions and sex are important when improving your marriage.
Sex can become a dirty or taboo subject when we don’t talk about it. We grow up with extreme, fear-based, and shame-based sexual view from conservative, religious upbringings. Couples counseling can be a safe place to start to break down these feelings of guilt, shame, and fear around sex.
Talking about sex helps you have more sex and learn about your partner’s sexual desires.
As well, there are different kinds of sexual desire, responsive desire and spontaneous sexual desire. Sometimes, you are responding to your partner’s sex drive, even if you aren’t feeling in the mood. Having sex, even when you don’t want to necessarily, is important for your relationship.
Marriage counseling can help you become open to your partner when they initiate sex, and have fun sexually without a specific performance outcome in mind.
Take turns initiating sex, and accept your partner’s offer to have sex. Sadly, many couples fall into a cycle of sexual avoidance and sexual rejection. When sex falls to the back burner, it can be hard to get the spice back.
Pornogrpahy videos often show people very, very turned on when having sex. We don’t have sex positive places to learn about sex. Couples counseling can be a safe place to slow down, see what feels good to you, and what feels good to your partner.
Getting in tune with your partner’s body and your own can be benefits of couples counseling.
On a basic level, marriage counseling helps you be curious about how touch can soothe your nervous system and your partner’s. Holding hands, a form of non-sexual touch, can be soothing and relaxing. Healthy touch is a key way to bond, feel close, and feel safe together. In marriage therapy, you can talk about the disconnect and what is preventing you from having healthy touch and sexual desire in your relationship.
As well, many times, there is performance pressure to stay hard, and you may internalize unrealistic expectations from pornography. Pornography is not proper sexual health education. But, a lot of people turn to pornography for educational material around sex. Instead, couples counseling can offer sexual education. In real life sexual experiences, you don’t have to be super horny all the time when it comes to having regular sex.
When you partner touches you, lean in for that kiss.
And, when you can’t emotionally, you may need the help of an expert. With Katie Ziskind, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, can help you address the emotional aspects of sex. You may need to talk about past relationship pain, trauma, and loss that prevents you from being sexually open. Emotionally distant couples, with a history of trauma and loss, can get stuck when it comes to being receptive to each other sexually.
From trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling with Katie Ziskind, you can develop emotional receptivity that transfers into sexual passion and sexual exploration.
Let your partner’s sexual desire guide you both into a physically and sexually bonding moment. So, be responsive to your partner’s desire, and let their desire build yours.
As well, to have a healthy sex life, accept your partner’ bids and invitations when it comes to them initiating sex. Sexual desire won’t just instantly emerge. Don’t wait for your sexual desire to always be super high when it comes to sex. Maintain your sexual spark takes maintenance sex, and sexual conversations.
Just like you talk about what you are going to eat for dinner, make sex a and sexual pleasure positive and regular topic of conversation.
Talk about sex outside of your bedroom, just like you would any other topic. You can easily and frequently talk about finances, parenting, and home projects. So, talk about sex and your sexual desires in the same, open way. Make sex something fun to talk about. To add, talk about what you like to feel sexual pleasure outside of your bedroom, not in a sexual moment. Talk about when you want to have sex. Scheduling sex into your week makes it a priority. Career development, parenting, and other activities can get in the way of sex when you don’t add sex to. your calendar.
Furthermore, at Wisdom Within Counseling, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey, can help you talk about sexual experiences after the fact. Talking about sex, what you enjoyed, and found pleasurable after having sex can help you and your partner understand what you both liked.
In Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, your couples counselor can help you feel safe having sexual conversations.
Having more safe sexual conversations evolves into deep connection and supports sexual desire.
You can talk about things like eye contact, and specific sexual activities make you feel moved.
As well, you can talk about what turns you on, builds your sexual desire, and what arouses you sexually. You and your spouse may not have a safe place to talk about sex and what turns you each on. We never get to talk comfortably about sex and sexual desire. Often, you and your partner have different needs, sexual fantasies, and desires when it comes to creating a positive, pleasurable, and erotic sex life.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you improve your emotional intimacy, fostering a passionate sex life.
Working with our couples therapists who specialize in complex trauma bonds can help you understand how childhood trauma and current relationship trauma play a role in your sex life.
In trauma bond specialized couples counseling you can talk about what you need emotionally to feel open sexually. Trust is a big part of having a healthy sex life.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling is a safe place to talk about what your ideal sex life looks like and rebuild emotional intimacy. In marriage counseling, you can rebuild trust and emotional intimacy to create beautiful sexual experiences together.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling is a valuable resource in fostering emotional intimacy, which is foundational for the development of a strong and healthy sexual connection within your relationship.
Essentially, emotional intimacy involves a deep emotional connection, trust, and vulnerability between you and your spouse. Through marriage counseling, you and your partner can explore and understand each other’s emotional needs and desires. At Wisdom Within Counseling, your couples counselor helps you create a solid foundation of emotional closeness that seamlessly transitions into better sexual intimacy.
Couples counseling helps you gain open communication to talk about your emotional needs and sexual desires.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, our Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey help you and your partner express your feelings, fears, and expectations in a safe and non-judgmental space.
This communication allows you and your spouse to become more attuned to each other emotionally. Better communication helps in establishing a level of understanding that can enhance your emotional bond.
A better emotional connection creates a more fulfilling, pleasurable sexual connection.
Our marriage counselors work with your and your spouse to identify and address any underlying issues that may be affecting your emotional intimacy.
Unresolved conflicts, past traumas, or communication barriers can hinder the emotional connection between you both.
By tackling these issues in marriage therapy, you both can create a healthier emotional environment, laying the groundwork for a more satisfying, safe, and positive sexual relationship.
Another significant benefit of couples counseling with our complex trauma bond specialists is the exploration of intimacy-building exercises.
Your marriage therapist will introduce various activities and techniques that promote emotional closeness, such as guided communication exercises, trust-building exercises, and emotional sharing. These exercises not only strengthen your emotional bond. These skills also help you have with tools to translate this newfound emotional intimacy into your sexual relationship.
Couples counseling in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling also focuses on increasing your overall relationship satisfaction, which naturally extends to the sexual aspect of your partnership.
As emotional intimacy deepens, you and your spouse will experience a greater sense of connection and fulfillment in all aspects of your relationship. Emotional connection fosters closeness in the physical realm.
Building a strong emotional foundation through marriage counseling contributes to a more satisfying, pleasurable, and enjoyable sexual connection for both of you.
Moreover, couples counseling in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling addresses both individual and shared values, beliefs, and expectations related to sexuality.
By openly discussing sex in a positive safe space, you can align your sexual preferences and desires together.
Talking about sex in a positive way creates a more harmonious and enjoyable sexual relationship. This alignment contributes to a deeper understanding of each other’s needs. Talking about sex and sexuality fosters an environment where both of you feel heard and validated.
In conclusion, in Hoboken, New Jersey, couples counseling plays a crucial role in helping you build a foundation of emotional intimacy that seamlessly transfers into sexual intimacy.
Through improved communication, addressing underlying issues, engaging in intimacy-building exercises, and aligning values, you both can strengthen your emotional connection and create a more satisfying, in tune, and fulfilling sexual relationship.
Working together in couples therapy allows you and your partner to navigate challenges, deepen your bond, and ultimately enhance the overall quality of your relationship.
At Wisdom Within Counseling in Hoboken, New Jersey, our complex trauma bond specialists help you both curiously learn about each other, which promotes an environment of open communication.
Right now, there may be resentment, fears, and insecurities that are preventing you both from being open and emotionally with each other.
Couples counseling can encourage and guide you both in developing emotional vulnerability skills. Talking about your deeper, core emotions can foster emotional intimacy.
By being emotionally vulnerable and curious about each other, you can both learn how to open up. This means that you both get to be more of your authentic selves.
And, when you grow up in an environment of chaos, childhood trauma, and have a narcissistic parent, you were not able to be your authentic self. So, couples therapy at Wisdom Within Counseling maybe the first time in your life where you are able to be your authentic self.
If your partner accidentally criticizes you or jumps down your throat, your couples therapist can pause your partner and help redirect them.
Couples counseling for childhood trauma is a safe environment to practice being emotionally vulnerable, which can be a little bit scary at first.
It can be scary when you were criticized in childhood for trying to be yourself. Due to childhood trauma, you had to prioritize your narcissistic or alcoholic parents’ emotional needs over your own.
You were constantly walking on eggshells, and never were embraced or accepted by your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parents. Essentially, you were never able to be yourself growing up because of the childhood trauma that you experienced.
In marriage counseling with our trauma bond specialists in Hoboken, New Jersey, your couples therapist can give you perspective and education on the effects of childhood neglect.
You can learn about early years of trauma bonding with your narcissistic parent, and help you develop healthy relationship skills to use now.
As well, you can get connected to your intuition, and develop a sense of inner wisdom, and start to have a confident voice in your romantic relationship.
Right now, you might feel uneasy speaking up because you are afraid your partner will give you and the same treatment that your abusive, narcissistic parent gave you growing up.
As well, you may also have an inner fear that you will become your narcissistic parent. And, more than anything you want to be the exact opposite of your emotionally abusive parent.
Another component to noticing and breaking the cycle of trauma bonding in your romantic relationship is recognizing your self-worth.
When you grow up with childhood abuse and neglect from an alcoholic or narcissistic mother or father, you often have a very little self-worth.
You don’t realize that you deserve respect in loving relationships when you have a narcissistic parent. Your narcissistic and alcoholic parent taught you that you deserved to be criticize, belittled, and diminish on a daily basis.
Growing up in a home where you were constantly walking on eggshells, means that you became numb to emotionally and physically abusive behaviors.
Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling helps you resolve and identify this unhealthy cycle of abuse that occurred between you and your narcissistic or alcoholic parent.
As well, trauma bond couples counseling can help you break any trauma bonding behaviors that you may be carrying and replicating in your current romantic relationship and marriage.
Growing up when you have an emotionally abusive, narcissistic parent, you develop a trauma bond with them. When your a narcissistic, alcoholic, and emotionally unstable parent treats you poorly, they are hot and cold. One day, your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent is happy and the next day they are in a rage, screaming and yelling.
Intermittently, your narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent gave you affection, but it was not consistent.
Having a narcissistic, emotionally abusive parent teaches you that chaos is a normal part of love. There are good moments, and then really bad, scary moments. In reality, love needs to be consistent. And, trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can teach you what healthy, respectful love looks like.
But, growing up in an abusive home, you learned that love was inconsistent. You were belittled, criticized, and verbally abused daily. It can be very hard to develop a healthy romantic relationship in adulthood when you have a parent who is emotionally abusive, narcissistic and an alcoholic.
Additionally, when you are in a romantic relationship, in your adult years, you want more than anything to feel love. Trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling can help fill in the gaps.
You felt so unloved growing up with a narcissistic, alcoholic mother or father that in your romantic relationship now, you want more than anything to feel safe and loved.
However, when you are in a conflict with your romantic partner, this triggers that fear of loss of closeness more than anything. Trauma bond marriage therapy can be a safe place to learn how to develop emotional closeness.
You can learn to have less high conflict fights and learn to keep arguments from getting out of hand. Marriage therapy with our complex trauma bond specialists is a safe place to communicate to your romantic partner what you need to feel loved. Your trauma bond couples therapists in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling will help you communicate your needs.
From understanding what you need to feel loved and secure, your romantic partner can better reassure and support you. Additionally, trauma bond couples counseling is a safe place to learn about expanding your sex life.
From talking about emotional support, you can learn how to have regular physical touch and emotional intimacy in your relationship.
Marriage counseling in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling with Katie Ziskind can help you address emotional aspects to physical intimacy.
You may want to talk about sadness, loss, grief, embarrassment, betrayal, criticism, and even shame and guilt.
There are often so many emotions that need processing. Instead of trying to sweep them under the rug in your marriage, relationship therapy with Katie Ziskind can help you verbalize your emotions.
Sweeping emotions under the rug leads to a sexless marriage, resentment, and anger issues. Both of you may be stuck in a negative standoff where you blame and criticize each other. Marriage counseling, in in Hoboken, New Jersey, nestled along the Hudson River, offers stunning views of the Manhattan skyline.
When you are in sadness, rejected, feeling abandoned, experiencing betrayal, and hopeless about your marriage, life losses its beauty.
Maybe, you dread and even avoid time with your spouse or romantic partner because you fear they may put you down, criticize you, and blame you. Live in Hoboken, New Jersey, the rich history, diverse community, historic brownstones, and waterfront areas loose their liveliness. Life becomes dull, sad, and skies don’t seem as pretty anymore when you want connection with your spouse, and no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to get closer. To add, these beautiful views become tainted and sad when your romantic relationship is in disarray and when you feel alone in your marriage.
Starting in couples counseling can give you a safe place to unpack the past, talk about intense subjects with guidance, and develop emotional understanding. Marriage counseling with Katie Ziskind at Wisdom Within Counseling can help you both apologize for past hurts and traumas, and recognize how to emotionally support each other. Learning to give affection, love, compliments, and healthy touch are parts of relationship therapy with Katie Ziskind.
Being emotionally vulnerable supports emotional closeness and sexual desire. Katie Ziskind gives you both a safe space to talk, cry, and reflect on all you have been through as a couple.
In order to repair from past trauma both in childhood and trauma within your relationship, marriage counseling helps improve your romantic relationship.
From trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can learn how to verbalize appreciation and fondness for each other.
Instead of getting stuck in negative criticisms, hurtful jabs, and conflict, you can learn to show affection openly and give comforting, sensual touch.
When you go through childhood trauma, narcissistic abuse, and neglect, couples therapy is the first time you get to develop a secure connection.
Your trauma bond marriage therapist acts as a model showing you how to have a secure, loving, and emotionally intimate relationship together.
In your relationship with your narcissistic, alcoholic parent, there were constant emotional attacks, anger, and chaos. You’ve always had to walk on eggshells up until now.
But, with your current romantic partner or spouse, in the process of trauma bond couples counseling, you can start to develop a safe, emotionally intimate, and secure bond.
You can break free from the fears of fight, flight, and freeze survival mechanisms that are reactions to stress and anxiety.
You can learn how your body is constantly in survival mode still, simply from having grown up in a chaotic environment. From trauma bond couples therapy with Katie Ziskind in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can talk with your partner and communicate your emotional needs.
Often, couples who are distant, lonely, and perpetually upset with each other never talk about emotional needs. Relationship therapy with Katie Ziskind in Hoboken, New Jersey supports exploring these emotional needs, which fosters security, closeness, and intimacy.
As well, you can talk about what situation or behaviors re-trigger childhood memories of loss and pain. For instance, when you have a fear of abandonment, you may have had a parent who abandoned you.
Now, when your partner takes space or needs to be alone, this can come off as a threat to your relationship due to abandonment fears.
Your spouse or romantic partner take space might be them needing to cool off heightened emotions due to their own trauma triggers. As well, your partner might need to be alone for a period of time to soothe themselves and cool off if a fight got out of hand. However, you might desire to talk it out right then. When you partner avoids you, this can trigger your fear of adandonment. When your partner takes space and chooses to be alone, this really triggers a reaction and in your brain your survival mechanisms.
Couples counseling can help you identify your feelings and emotions and communicate them with your partner. For instance, you can look at how you start to develop anxiety and how your fear of loss and abandonment is re-triggered as a result of your partner taking space.
We can talk about how long space needs to be taken for, to support reassurance and a secure bond. Perhaps, instead of taking space outside of your shared living environment, your partner can take space in a certain room.
This can help to support more emotional reassurance in your relationship. As well, in trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling you can better understand the reasons why your partner might need to take space.
Instead of getting away or threatening ending the relationship, your partner can learn to communicate that their own trauma triggers and inner childhood wounds are resurfacing in conflicts.
Your partner can talk about their negative feelings and how they struggle to know how to resolve conflicts too.
There can be a sense of positive growth and healing when it comes to breaking free from a trauma bond in your current romantic relationship. Couples counseling with our complex trauma specialists can help you be yourself, express your emotions calmly, and better understand your partners emotional needs and conflict.
You can also learn ways to self regulate and calm your emotions when you experience anger, panic, or fears of loss and abandonment from trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling.
Marriage counseling with our trauma bond specialists can help you process the various emotions that come up from love.
When you love your partner deeply, you don’t want them to end the relationship, and more than anything you want to secure, safe connection.
And, your fears of loss are often only triggered by someone that you love deeply, and want a long-term relationship with. You may also have goals for your future with your romantic partner, so resolving relationship conflicts from a trauma-based perspective can be very empowering.
Our Wisdom Within Counseling marriage therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling help you understand the impact of a childhood trauma bonds. You can have a safe place to process childhood trauma, and the impact of narcissistic abuse.
Relationship counseling and marriage therapy can provide a safe space to unravel the complex emotions resulting from emotional abuse and narcissistic parenting.
Katie Ziskind and the Wisdom Within Counseling couples therapists are extensively trained in trauma and relationship dynamics. Working with our relationship counselors can help you understand the impact of these trauma experiences and offer validation for your feelings. Processing feelings in couples counseling creates a foundation for marital healing.
C-PTSD symptoms from narcissistic abuse in childhood often contribute to communication breakdowns, emotional distance, and marital conflicts.
Therapeutic interventions equip you and your spouse with effective communication tools. Learning to express emotions and needs constructively can foster a more empathetic and supportive connection, breaking the cycle of the silent treatment and promoting healthier dialogue.
Relationship counseling with our complex trauma bond specialists in Hoboken, New Jersey can address not only the impact of having a narcissistic parent but also the resulting C-PTSD symptoms that perpetuate emotional distance.
Couples therapy with Katie Ziskind offers a platform for joint healing, allowing you both to navigate the complexities of trauma together. Relationship counseling fosters a shared understanding that strengthens your emotional and sexual bond.
As a survivors of emotional abuse, you may find yourself stuck in patterns that perpetuate negativity in your relationship.
Relationship therapy with our complex trauma bond specialists provides a roadmap to identify and break these dysfunctional cycles. By recognizing and addressing destructive behaviors, you both can replace them with positive interactions. In couples therapy, you can create a foundation for a more supportive and nurturing relationship.
As well, emotional abuse can erode trust, leading to profound challenges in maintaining a healthy relationship and sex life. Katie Ziskind and the Wisdom Within Counseling marriage therapists guide the process of rebuilding trust, helping you both to feel secure and connected.
This involves addressing past wounds, establishing boundaries, and fostering an environment where both of you feel respected, loved, appreciated, and valued.
Emotional abuse and C-PTSD symptoms can contribute to frequent conflicts and despair and emotional pain in your marriage.
Essentially, emotional distance often results from trauma, making it difficult for you both to connect on a deeper level. Relationship counseling with Katie Ziskind, complex trauma bond specialist, facilitates the exploration of emotional intimacy. Talking about emotional intimacy allows you to rediscover your emotional connection that has been been lost.
By cultivating vulnerability and emotional openness, you both can build a stronger foundation for your sex life, love life, and relationship.
Marriage therapy with Katie Ziskind in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling equips you both with effective conflict resolution skills. You can learn to talk about sex, physical intimacy, and learn how to navigate disagreements without resorting to harmful behaviors.
Likewise, learning to address both emotional and sexual issues constructively fosters a healthier emotional environment.
You both can help each other feel loved, supported, valued, and significant from specific techniques with Katie Ziskind in relationship therapy after trauma and narcissistic abuse. As well, you can start to feel in love again, rebuild playfulness, sexual desire, and stop rejecting and criticizing each other. Trauma bond couples counseling supports your long-term relationship satisfaction and a healthy sex life.
Understanding how having an abusive, neglectful, and narcissistic mother or father impacts having a trauma bond in a romantic relationship is a key part of marriage counseling.
You and your current romantic partner or spouse can move together as a unit towards healing from childhood trauma. Instead of re-triggering each other, you can rebuild trusts. You don’t have to bring out the worst sides and each other in a fight.
From trauma bond couples therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey at Wisdom Within Counseling, you can learn how to reassure each other emotionally.
At Wisdom Within Counseling, our couples counselors specialize when you both have a history of complex trauma that gets re-triggered in fights. Instead of getting sucked into a negative, hurtful cycle of conflict, you can turn towards each other. You can learn co-regulation and nurturing skills to better your emotional and sexual intimacy.
Where in New Jersey can you and your spouse work with our trauma bond couples therapists at Wisdom Within Counseling?
Wisdom Within Counseling helps distant couples in therapy in Hoboken (located along the Hudson River), Cresskill (a Bergen County borough), Holmdel (a Monmouth County town), Montclair, Livingston (located in Essex County), Chatham (Chatham Borough and Chatham Township), Ridgewood (in Bergen County), Princeton (Home to Princeton University), Summit, Short Hills (in Millburn Township with close proximity to New York City), Westfield (in Union County), Saddle River (a Bergen County borough), Upper Saddle River (Bergen County town), Far Hills (in Somerset County), Bernardsville (Nestled in the Somerset Hills), Rumson (Situated along the Jersey Shore in Monmouth County), Mendham (a Morris County town), Glen Ridge (in Essex County), Tenafly (Located in Bergen County), Demarest (a Bergen County borough), Westfield, New Jersey.
Video counseling services also available in Connecticut, Florida, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, Louisiana, Tennessee, North Carolina, Kansas, Kentucky, Virginia, West Virginia, Ohio, Maryland, Delaware, Washington, Montana, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Indiana, Vermont, Iowa, Missouri, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Utah, New Hampshire, and Maine.
